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Philbin's Poor Body Language and Communication: A Brief Analysis

Discussion in 'Miami Dolphins Forum' started by infiltrateib, Sep 1, 2012.

  1. infiltrateib

    infiltrateib Oh Hi Luxury Box

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    I'm not sure if this should be subsumed into another thread, but it's a thought I've had as I read the news and watch Hard Knocks. I'm a pretty solid football mind -- not on par with CK or alen1 or Boomer or those guys -- but I'm more in the social sciences. My job involves a lot of reading people and situations, and I've been really interested in communication. I read a lot about it.

    As I've watched Philbin, I've tried to start with a blank slate. But I've studied him, and find his communication really terrible, and in a team sport in which coaching is pretty important to rapport, respect, and performance, I think it's critical. He might be the worst I've ever seen. I wouldn't trust him for a second (I'm not saying he is lying, but we subconsciously pay attention to these things, and we can't help how we internally react).

    First, his body language is terrible.
    • He rarely squares his shoulders to people he's talking to (showing a lack of interest or respect), he squirms (discomfort), and he refuses to make eye contact (distrust). This can all be very off-putting to people, and inhibits developing trust.
    • He rarely shows the palms of his hands (another indicator of truth/trust) and constantly puts them in his pockets.
    • He crosses his legs (barrier, stubborn), bounces his foot on his knee (dislike).
    • He's stiff, and he doesn't mirror (i.e., he doesn't react to body language in others by mirroring it himself... this is a sign of rapport, good communication and empathy). For example, if you watch the section of Hard Knocks where Jake, Karlos, and Reggie meet with Philbin, you'll see a lot of this. All three of the players have a relaxed body language, including leaning forward, spreading their legs (sounds weird, but it's openness when displayed by males), and showing their palms (truth). Philbin is stiff, upright, fidgety, and closed-off. He does not ever engage with the player speaking. He doesn't mirror -- not even in the slightest.

    Second, his verbal communication is also terrible:
    • He is incredibly indirect. It's startling. When he had the conversation with Chad on the field, it took him over 90 seconds to get his initial point across. He could have just said, "You have to carry yourself a little more professionally when you're behind that podium." Instead, he meandered around until I literally felt uncomfortable watching the interaction.
    • He interrupts with sound effects and noises, constantly. He says "uh-huh," "yeah," and "ok" several times before the speaker is finished even making a point. This screams, "I'm not even listening; I've made up my mind and I'm just waiting until you're done talking so I can make my point."
    • He doesn't mirror what players are saying. For example, we often hear people use the same words we used, to show that they understand. This is something anyone with a wife or girlfriend should know. "I understand you're concerned about _____." Or, "I think I get what you're saying -- you think _____."
    • Note that he also never even looked at Chad, and was busying himself by looking away and bending down to pick stuff up. It made him seem disinterested and awkward.
    • He alternates between first and third-person, which makes him seem on edge and aloof at the same time.
    • He doesn't say the player's name (uses "you" a lot), which detracts from bonding.
    • When Chad walked into the coaches meeting, he wasn't stern (which would have garnered respect). He let Chad run roughshod over him by trying to use silly subtle cues and strange jokes. Don't get me wrong, Chad was an idiot -- but that was an embarrassing display of leadership.
    • Philbin re-starts his sentences constantly, which is a really bad quality. It makes people hard to understand, and leaves listeners to interpret multiple fragmented sentences.
    • When he cut Chad, he spoke nonsense. He didn't give anything close to a direct answer. He seemed nervous and on-edge. He flocked to ambiguity. Chad was, again, completely in the wrong -- but he was very direct and I (strangely) felt connected with him based on his communication and posture. He knew he had done wrong. Philbin kept saying things like "not good for either side" and just refused to handle business directly. As a player, if I caught that on HBO, I'd be very distrustful of the man and I'd never feel like I knew where I stood.

    Some might call me nit-picky, but this stuff jumped off the screen at me. This is stuff that's not all that complicated, and a guy who has been in the NFL for decades should know how to (1) display trust, compassion, and understanding, while also (2) commanding respect. You do that by listening, but being direct. You use fewer words. You mirror body language and verbal language. Even if you're going to say (essentially) "eff you," you do so carefully and by acknowledging the situation before dropping the hammer.

    When I watch Philbin, he makes me uncomfortable. I wouldn't do business with the guy. I'm not calling for his head or anything, but I'm saying I wouldn't be surprised if there's a disconnect between him and the locker room this season. I hate to say it, but listen to (and watch) guys like Rex Ryan. He's brief, he's direct, he mirrors (both in language and in posture -- watch him!), he looks people in the eye, and he garners a lot of trust from his players.

    Anyway, just my two cents. Take it for what you will, but this "reading body language" stuff has worked out well for me in the past, and I think it's more important than people give it credit for. I also think it's things you naturally notice and feel, even if you don't know you're reacting to it.
     
  2. shouright

    shouright Banned

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    I would encourage you to watch him in press conferences and with his assistant coaches and notice the difference, and then consider that his behavior with players at this point reflects a conscious choice to have an air of detachment and intimidation so as to start his tenure with the team by establishing his authority.

    I suspect that when he has the kinds of players he wants and the team culture has changed, his demeanor will relax into what you see in press conferences, with his assistants, and with players like Eric Steinbach.
     
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  3. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

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    You basically make the claim that Philbin is untrustworthy, lacks respect and won't garner respect....and that he should more emulate Rex Ryan, head of one the worst disciplined teams we've seen in the modern era of football. A man who is so a slave to his emotions, he's cried on more than one occasion during a press conference.

    That's what you're saying?
     
  4. infiltrateib

    infiltrateib Oh Hi Luxury Box

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    Oh, I forgot to mention the thing with Steinbach -- his posture was TOTALLY different. He had his arm up on the chair (confidence, comfort in the situation), had his shoulders square (attention), and while he did touch his face a bit (lying), he was engaging. He also had a much more relaxed verbal cadence.

    I hear you, I really do. I understand if that's his thought process. The intent there is great -- we have had some guys with maturity issues, and I support his desire to own that room. But I don't think his technique is effective.

    Let me give you an example. You tell me how the following speech would go over:

    "You guys likely heard about what happened last night with Chad. It's an unfortunate situation. We're going to wait to find out more about what happened and gather more facts. But I'll tell you, that's not Chad's first strike. I've been very clear about how I want this team to conduct themselves at that podium, and how I expect them to act when they're at this facility. Chad had some issues outside of this facility, but he also had a lot of them inside of it. I've had conversations with him about interrupting meetings, acting aloof, and failing to pay attention in meetings and at practice. I'm not going to stand for that behavior from anyone. You know what I expect of you, and I'll be clear with you when you're not meeting it. I was clear with Chad. I'm going to continue to be clear with Chad. And I'll be clear with you when I make my decision about what to do about it."

    THAT gets respect, lets them know who the boss is, and makes them feel somewhat comfortable at the same time.

    Another example, the "high council" meeting: "I understand what you guys are saying. I think you SHOULD have a voice on this team. I will try to communicate better with you about the things I'm concerned about -- to the extent I can -- so you can be a voice of this team and this regime. But you should also know that was not Chad's first strike. I was very clear with him about my expectations for him, and I have to have the respect of my players. If Chad purposely violates that trust and respect, he's making his own decision, and I have to do what I have to do. I can't stand for incidents like that one. When I released Chad, it wasn't just about that incident. It was about how he performed and how he conducted himself as a Miami Dolphin. I'll make an effort to bring things to your attention earlier. But you also have to understand I'm the ball coach and sometimes I'm forced to make tough decisions for this club."
     
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  5. GreysonWinfield

    GreysonWinfield Release The Hounds

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    ****can him
     
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  6. infiltrateib

    infiltrateib Oh Hi Luxury Box

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    I won't say anything about your communication style there... but yes, I think he would do well to emulate some of Rex Ryan's behavior. Not how he creates or structures a team, not how he chooses his players, not how he conducts his practices or manages his roster. I think he has some problem children there to manage. But I also think Rex's players would run through a wall for him, because they trust him.
     
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  7. MikeHoncho

    MikeHoncho -=| Censored |=-

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    Bill Bellichick found this write-up amusing

    [​IMG]
     
  8. jsizzle

    jsizzle Banned

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    *if I can't say something nice, don't say anything at all*
     
  9. infiltrateib

    infiltrateib Oh Hi Luxury Box

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    Sigh. I didn't intend to walk into pithy sarcastic crossfire, I just wanted to make a point that I think he's going to struggle to connect with his players. He's a first-year head coach. He's going to have lumps. I'm opining that this could be one of them.
     
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  10. His'nBeatYour'n

    His'nBeatYour'n Glass Ceiling Repairman

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    infiltrateib
    Great post, I've felt the same when watching Philbin on Hard Knocks, though lacked the expertise to articulate it.

    I wonder if you saw any change in the last episode. To me Philbin actually seemed much more direct. My feeling is he finally watched an episode, and saw how he was coming off.
     
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  11. infiltrateib

    infiltrateib Oh Hi Luxury Box

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    Thanks. I haven't seen episode 4. Going to try to watch tonight. I'll definitely pay attention.
     
  12. Ronnie Bass

    Ronnie Bass Luxury Box Luxury Box

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    I'm on Philbin's side but I noticed his odd body language as well, it don't mean he won't make a good HC because Shout has a good thought that once he acclimates himself with the roster he might be more open, but right now whenever I see him talking to a player, he can at times seem so distant from them. The conversation he had with I think Soliai on the sidelines about him not wearing a raincoat was painful to watch, it seemed like he was being bothered by Soliai.
     
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  13. His'nBeatYour'n

    His'nBeatYour'n Glass Ceiling Repairman

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    That is an unfair summary.
     
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  14. pocoloco

    pocoloco I'm your huckleberry Club Member

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    I think the summary is:

    Philbin likes football, but doesn't like football players.
     
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  15. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

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    His players won't win a championship for him though. The players loved Sparano too.

    I think you're doing a few things wrong here, namely creating your opinion based on Hardknocks and believing your interpretation of what a coach should be is important in any way.

    Even if Philbin has been on screen the entire length of each episode, you've still only seen 4 hours of interaction out of 4-5 months. That is far from enough data to make any judgement...and we know you have even less data than that since he wasn't on screen the whole time.

    The facts are, the biggest mouth in the NFL thanked him after being fired. The 3 leaders of the team were upset and instead of arguing, approached him from a place of wanting to help. He was impressive enough for Green Bay's current coaching staff to not only keep him when they came in but promote him through the ranks so high the HC called his gameplan.
     
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  16. Losferwords

    Losferwords Member

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    This post is SO freaking spot on that I registered to reply to it.

    I am in leadership position in the corporate word and I have to have "tough" conversations with people all the time.

    Rules of engagement when it comes to having developmental/coaching/or performance related conversations are as follows:

    1) Be direct
    2) Look people in eye
    3) Do NOT have any distracting mannerisms/verbal cues
    4) Be honest
    5) LISTEN!


    Philbin's body language and verbal communication "skills" are abhorred and display NONE of these critical characteristics.

    This will ultimately be his undoing at the vets will turn on him just like Cameron.
     
  17. shouright

    shouright Banned

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    I think trust comes from things far greater than body language and verbal communication style.

    Trust comes from believing someone has your back, and I think Philbin is the kind of person who not only has the back of the people he values and wants on his team, but also is able to communicate that to them well enough to create that trust, despite his idiosyncracies.

    Everybody's different, and everybody communicates slightly differently from everybody else. But there's nothing in Joe Philbin's demeanor or principles as he's expressed them that suggests to me he's someone you can't trust.

    Now, do I think some players are walking on eggshells at this point? Sure, but there's a new sheriff in town here, and I think Joe Philbin wants to communicate that.
     
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  18. His'nBeatYour'n

    His'nBeatYour'n Glass Ceiling Repairman

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    Good. I look forward to it.

    And I'm glad you noticed Philbin was much different when dealing with Steinbach. Those were the scenes that helped me appreciate just how awkward Philbin was in the rest.

    It seems from the scenes with Steinbach, that Philbin is much more natural around people he knows well. So I found hope that he may develop better nonverbal communication with players over time.

    I think Philbin doesn't know how to "pretend" to be a leader. Which I think Ryan absolutely does. Though acting the part is a useful tool for leaders. I don't know if it is something that a head coach learns to do, because this is the first time Hard Knocks has shown us a first time head coach. Hopefully we are seeing him at his worst.
     
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  19. shouright

    shouright Banned

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    I fixed that to fit my opinion. ;)
     
  20. brandon27

    brandon27 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    Seriously? that's all you got from that entire post? Clearly that was not the point of his entire post.

    :no:

    I do agree with most of this analysis though. He seems so awkward and uncomfortable at times. I dont know if its because of the hard knocks cameras there in "intimate" moments he'd rather not be recorded or if it is something else entirely, but I do get what youre saying. However hard knocks has shown some of his speeches at halftme and after games, and he seems like a completely different person, much like he does in press conferences. So, I'm really not sure what to think of him.
     
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  21. shouright

    shouright Banned

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    I would think that having the flexibility to vary your approach based on the person you're talking to and the situation you're in would be far more valuable than using a "one-size-fits-all" approach like this.

    The corporate world frequently consists of people who have gone to trainings in which someone is making money by teaching the single "right" way of doing something, despite the fact that it isn't based on any empirical evidence.

    There's a lot of money to be made in teaching "corporate success."
     
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  22. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

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    I disagree.

    The logical conclusion of this exercise is to point out flaws in Philbins ability to coach effectively. The example of the opposite of Philbin's approach is Rex Ryan. Rex Ryan is not an effective coach and its not because of his X & O's. Its because of his communication and the way he carries himself. His team is chaos and they should have won a SB with the talent they've had.
     
  23. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

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    The corporate world and the football field are not analogous in anyway when it comes to effective communication.
     
  24. infiltrateib

    infiltrateib Oh Hi Luxury Box

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    You re-characterized and belittled my thought-out post, and then you post this unfounded and conclusory statement. You may disagree with me, but I backed up my point with what I viewed to be facts. This is just "I said it, so it must be so."
     
  25. JMHPhin

    JMHPhin Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    Seeriously when one tells me they're great, i tune out
     
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  26. UCF FINatic

    UCF FINatic The Miami Dolphins select

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    Steinbach is a whole different animal. He coached Steinbach in college and has a lot of rapport with him.
     
  27. electrolyte

    electrolyte New Member

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    is this thread real life?

    where's the thumbs down button.
     
  28. Losferwords

    Losferwords Member

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    These are basic tenants of effective communication... Not some psychobabble.

    Keep in mind, I am referring specifically to having performance related conversations.
     
  29. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

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    I did not. I boiled it down to its main components. You think Philbin's communication skills are poor and that hinders him as a coach. You think Rex Ryan represents your ideals closely.

    I merely pointed out Rex Ryan is not a good coach because his team has no discipline in part because of his communication skills. I wasn't aware comparable word counts were required to counter another's point.
     
  30. shouright

    shouright Banned

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    Precisely, and that's what there will be more of across the board once he settles on his final 53 and coaches them for a whole season.

    Then in future seasons there will be more and more paring of the roster, and after several years, the players who remain will have established relationships with Philbin similar to the one Steinbach has.

    They may not be exactly like the relationship he has with Steinbach, since he was a position coach with Steinbach, but there will be a natural unfolding of closeness and bonding that occurs when people know each other over time. I don't think you can expect that at this point between a head coach and his new team.
     
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  31. shouright

    shouright Banned

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    I disagree. I think there are times when you want to have less eye contact with someone, for example, even though it's a performance-related conversation.

    I think there are times when you want to send a message to someone by deviating from these principles on purpose, and someone who has the flexibility to do that is more capable than someone who does not IMO.
     
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  32. His'nBeatYour'n

    His'nBeatYour'n Glass Ceiling Repairman

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    Rex Ryan brought two teams with Mark Sanchez as QB to the AFC championship in his first two years. How you can call him "not an effective coach" is beyond me.

    Ultimately I think the all bluster, "acting the told of a head coach" is unsustainable. Guys like Rex get diminished returns.

    His assessment was really thought out, he supplied more back up to his points than I've seen in entire threads on this forum. And most importantly, he didn't come to some sky is falling conclusion, said "I'm not asking for his head."

    I just thought you were treating his post like it was just another "sky is falling I hate the Dolphins/Irealand/Ross" soapbox rant. I thought it was unfair.
     
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  33. gilv13

    gilv13 Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]
     
  34. Marco

    Marco Well-Known Member

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    He'll probably be more comfortable as soon as Hard Knocks is done. Even the last couple of press conferences have opened with laughter and light conversation, almost as if Philbin is relieved HBO will be packing up its cameras soon.
     
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  35. Ronnie Bass

    Ronnie Bass Luxury Box Luxury Box

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    I thought he made it pretty clear it could hinder him as a coach. If I felt like his post was saying it will I would have contested it.
     
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  36. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

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    Because he should have won the Super Bowl, but its the lack of discipline that cost them. Look at like this, you and everyone else know Ryan is acting. How is that effective communication?

    Again, I didn't need a long drawn out post to point out the fundamental flaw in the OP's assessment.
     
  37. His'nBeatYour'n

    His'nBeatYour'n Glass Ceiling Repairman

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    I completely agree. What makes me worry, if at all, is that Philbin at his age didn't know how to "fake it" until rapport develops.
     
  38. brandon27

    brandon27 Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    Alright, I'm going to say something here. It's threads like this that make me spend less and less time here than before. Someone goes to the trouble to write up a well thought out, and documented post regarding our head coach, and his communication style from what we've seen in hard knocks, and from his own personal experience in the field, and look at the responses we get. Rather than serious discussion, its quick, pointless sarcastic remarks, stupid pointless images that are supposed to be funny I guess, and people going out of their way to just bash the post itself, rather than a serious discussion about its contents. Its ridiculous, and reminds me of the place most of us left to come here. It's not just this thread, its many others too. I'm sure this wont go over well, but... IMO, it had to be said, especially since I think watching Philbin on Hard Knocks, it is awkward and uncomfortable the way he manages important conversations with his players. It may not be an opinion that 100% correct and fact... but its something worth debating and discussion, not putting down and mocking.
     
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  39. Losferwords

    Losferwords Member

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    No... people are people. No matter the "arena"
     
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  40. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh

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    I disagree.

    He very clearly comes to conclusions:
    I'm not sure how to take that any other way then I did.
     

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