My nephew does that to me when I wrestle him. He always goes knees first and after that, I feel like kickin' his behind lol.
Opie inspired this story This was awhile back, same day the wifey told me I was gunna be a Dad. I grew my own jalepeno peppers and had some on the table making salsa and guacamoli for the game. I finished, washed my hads good and sat down, waiting for the game.. I rubbed my lip, it started burning. I washed lip and hands again even gooder. Sat down, rubbed my eye, it burned(I'm amazed now because I seriously scrubbed the hands) I washed eye and hands again GOOD, took a piss. Sat down... suddenly I realized my junk was on fire and ran to the bathroom where I broke it out and was leaning over the sink washing yet again and I mean lit up too. Of course now the wifey comes around the corner and through her hysterical laughter asked, "what the hell are you doing?" see above for answer. A week later these same peppers hurt my buddy John something terrible. He opened the mason jar pulled one out and I told him don't do it.. well he did, actually swallowed some before the burn turned on. He rinsed his mouth for ten minutes before Scott said, time to go.. I was in Brooksville, they had to drive back to Jensen Beach. About two hours later Scott called to say they were at yet another rest stop for an emergency dump.. had to do it on the side of the Turnpike too.. :0
I love spicy/hot food, especially any kind of peppers. Greek Peppers aren't hot but they're so damn good. I ate ten once and had an emergency bathroom break.
yeah when you cut hot peppers make sure you wash your hands before you goto the bathroom or your gonna be stinging and not happy
No matter how legitimately the inside edge of your nose itches the second you reach your hand up to scratch it you will turn your head and see two of the most God given beautiful women you've ever seen staring and laughing at you because they think you're trying to poke yourself in the brain via your nasal opening.
lol that was great - I never watched that show when it was on but have learned to appreciate it more in syndication.
What I learned tonight. First of all it saddens me that common words have come to have more provocative meanings in today's language. Any of you that are familiar with Fry's Electronics know what I'm talking about - those of you that don't. Well here it is. After you make a purchase at Fry's you walk to the exit show your receipt to the person at the door and they take a peek in your bag and you go on your merry way. Today I had to go to Fry's to make an exchange for work and I took back a Tritton usb graphics adapter and I exchanged it for a few small odds and ends, nothing huge just some spare items I needed for my toolbox. Anyway on my way towards the door there was a rather cuteish girl standing there checking receipts & bags and being in a rather good mood as I approached her smiling and asked a question "Would you like to take a look at my junk?" (I was making reference to the odds and ends in the bag) From the look on her face you might think I just whipped out my wang and dragged it across her jeans. Needless to say she said "NO!" and turned away and didn't even look in my bag. I knew immediately from her reaction that my definition of "junk" and hers were not one in the same. Hell I could have stolen M&M's or something!
Now I know how to steal electronics...just threaten to whip out the jewels. It may result in several sexual assault charges but I'll have the sweetest electronics setup in town.
I used to live in Alaska, Dont use your e-brake below -10 degrees. Especially dont use it at -37 If you use it and it gets stuck, DO lay something on the ground as you take a wrench and bang your cable housing. DO NOT take off your gloves, to start the truck and forget to put them back on before grabbing the -37 degree wrench again with your bare hand. It will hiss and take a small chunk of meat with it after you throw it. DO not put your keys in your mouth after you drop them on the ground, they hiss when they touch your lips, and you have to go inside to get them off without lossing a chunk of lip like you did on your hand. True story...
Those are many reasons why I'm thrilled to be a lifelong Californian having to cope with days like today at 67 degrees. -37 that's just brutal.
The most recent thing I learned is that when you are trying to hang a shirt in your back drivers side window to create a make shift sun shade for your kid by pinching the shirt in the the window itself is that while trying to make sure you hold the shirt in place that you move your finger sufficiently off of the top of the window because while being turned around backwards in the drivers seat with one hand in the back of the car with said shirt and the other operating the window controls it is a poor time to roll the window up on one of your hands. It's quite a burning pain unlike most I've felt when the window closes on the tip of your finger and you get really stupid for a second not realizing what has just happened while continuing to hold the window in the up position. I thought the second gunman from the grassy knoll had shot my fingertip off.
I learned that promising to watch two uncontrolable 18 and 20 year old girls at a 4th of July party while you yourself are drunk as phuck because you swept the entire party people who played at beer pong with your partner (10-0) is not an easy thing to do when they drink they turn into horny little *****es who would make out with a blade of grass.
The 18 year old asked me to watch her because she didn't want to do anything she would regret, and the 20 year old is just a major ****. So I kind of turned 90% of my attention to the 18 year old, but I am protective of them both, so I kept a close eye on both. Big Brother made sure nothing happened between them and any guy. With other girls... that's a different story.
Sorry to ruin your fantasies sking, but my mother died when I was 7 and my sister lives in South Carolina, far away from New Jersey. It would be weird to see one of my lady friends making out with either of them, that's for sure.
Things I learned recently: Helping tear down a deck might seem like work. It's not. Breaking **** is tons of fun.
It is also way over-rated and over-expensive. I can get the same liquor at the liquor store that I can at a bar for much, much cheaper.
See, there are these things called "friends". You can invite them over to your home and tell them to BYOB and it will be just as fun as a bar and far less expensive
Never judge the potential occupant of a car by the license plate frame. Bright orange 2004 Mustang with "Everyone Love an Italian Girl" on the license plate frame. I was expecting a young Isabella Rosselini just based on the car so I blinked twice in anticipation of the staring I would soon be doing. what do I get? Flo from the t.v. show "Alice". If you're too young to get either reference go to google and find your answers.