***OFFICIAL*** THEPHINS.COM Roast of Opfinistic

**** you guys! Im not a murdering psychopath!













Yet.

 

this roast =

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NTUmrOfyUA"]YouTube- Rocky IV-Apollo Dies[/ame]

 

Throw the towel.....throw the towel...........throw the damn toweeelllll

 

Cut some parts due to length???? You should have saved that line for your post!

Dude, it ain't like this thread is going to be released in Blu-Ray with special features and Director's commentary!

Damn Son, let 'er rip....edit your post if you have to....

 

E, Sam, Sick, and Griddles...I havent seen this many vaginas since the last Ted Ginn thread.

Who appointed you losers anyway? because you post more in a lounge than you do in the actual sports forums?

Just to talk thread...I havent seen so many losers in one thread since I was over at Finheaven.

Gish....what can I say about Gish'r the guy everyone loves to hate, what can I say people hate you when your on top....ecspecially when its their wives.

Lucky..how does an illegal alien become a fin fan anyway? Were the playing on the big screen TV that you and 13 of your relatives snuck over into the U.S in?

Sorry oppie dont know enough about you to say much, other than I put this together in a bout the same time it took me to type it so if the jokes were bad....atleast Ill fit...fit like the fire log in FinsGirlies's love hole.

 

I haven't seen this many mods in one thread in awhile.
Fingers on the trigger boys...

 

I am glad yours is last..this thread is sooo closed once yours is posted.

 

should have been closed after your roast.........

 

its funny because his roast sucked.

 

Oddly enough...I do own a Dwyane Wade dildo.

 

Wow, you suck at roasts.

 

He often gets his Roasts and Eulogies mixed up.

 

Or... you can just sexually harass Griddles.

Your choice.

 

I thought Opie was in jail for molesting a small grapefruit at his nearby grocery store. Why kick someone when they are down?

 

Sam owns a Kobe Bryant Strap-on, with the sentence "You gonna get raped" enscribed on it.

Dont ask me how I know this.

 

How do you know this?

 

How do you think he really got those tickets to the NBA Finals last year?

 

Not to mention he got rope burn on his **** when he was jacking it to Sarah Palin(again dont ask)

 

What do this thread, a vaccuum and Opie all have in common?

 

they break down easily and burst into flames?

 

they weigh less than 8 pounds?

 

does anybody actually show up and post after you announce them? i just picture tumbleweeds when you post. Be honest, you just crashed the party and have nothing to do with it

 

I will post my **** on Monday.

 

monday...................

 

Their bags need changing?

 

Holy crap...that was horrible. This actually made the roast of Emmitt Smith seem funny. yes, even the parts when Emmitt spoke.

 

Hey....How y’all doin! This is one helluva event...When I got invited to the roast of Opfinistic, I
couldn’t resist. Seriously where else can just launch a series of insults at other posters other than
the Pofo of course?

Now that I am settled in here..I can use a drink. Excuse me Boy.... (Dirty Mexican walking
around), I’ll take a Glenlivet neat..and there will be a crisp George Washington in it for you. Oh
you aren’t a waiter? You are unluckyluciano? Really? Well you are mexican aren’t you......then
get me that drink. Let’s talk for a minute...other than drug traffiker, stickup artist, or loitering in
front of a liquor store...is there any other job that mexicans are best qualified for than a waiter? I
don’t mean to pick on unluckyluciano, But he once caused a 4 car wreck in a heavily Mexican
neighborhood....287 mexicans died. Ah..but what a great guy unluckyluciano is, he can serve
you a drink, then blast a bean fart and light your smoke. But enough with Lucky.

This dais is loaded with such illuminaries as Gish, Frumundah...what the **** is a frumundah
anyway? HardkoreXXX, Gridirionking34, Enforcefin33 and that frustrated loser SICK.

Now, I don’t want to say that SICK is a total loser..just a moderate one. The guy does a radio
show nobody hears. He makes posts on this board that nobody comments on, and he gives
opinions nobody cares to consider. Now......I don’t want to exaggerate, But this douchebag is the
only guy on earth that listens to every word telemarketers tell him because it feeds his delusions
of adequacy. His dream is to be on par with Sid Rosenberg. A respected radio personality. Or a
overbearing annoying former drug addcit, drunk, gambling loser with an annoying voice.
Well...at least I am glad he is pretty damn close to achieving one of those goals.

Which brings me to this strapping lad HardkoreXXX. His reputation is like no other. He is glib,
reasoned, relatively intelligent and he has tried to stick his dick in just about anything that has
ever walked or crawled. Which would usually suggest self esteem issues...but not this guy. To
say that he thinks his **** doesn’t stink is an insult to ****. Think about it. This guy even tried to
**** Fingirlie....oh what? Who cares if I made that up?......It felt good blurting that out.

Wow...look at this pile of crap sitting next me....oh jeeeez...the great GISH! Ladies and
Gentlemen! Now to say this guy is a little weird is an understatement...let’s analyze...he spends
most of the day designing snappy sigs and graphics..he then thunders into conversations with self
important opinions and bull****...he then changes his tone completely and has a pleasant tone in
the Lounge......all within 2 minutes......if that doesn’t raise one big giant red flag that tells you
that he flosses with human pubic hair from a fresh corpse and that he has a freeze dried colon he
cut out from his latest victim that he ****s on a regular basis..then I don’t know what is.

We have Frumundah ladies and gentlemen.....now this guy is better known as Mike13...he then
changed his name to Frumundah Finatic or some other ****.

Frumundah is defined in the Urban dictionary as the follows:

What a fitting name. At least he is honest.

Now...I would do a bit here on Enforcefin and Gridirion..but really...who gives a **** about
those two?


Which brings us all to the Guest of honor OPFINISTIC! Ah...Opie. Some of us learned of him
in the Lounge...most learned of him in the Ladies Lounge where he can be found thanking every
single post Pagan makes and then commenting with such brilliance as “Goin to Fap”...”Fap, Fap,
Fap” “My Ham is sore” “Gonna try and **** the old lady next door’..you know...witty stuff like
that. To say that he spends an unordinary amount of time in that forum is an understatement.
Which suggest many things. One could be that he is merely hitting on Pagan in an unusual way.
The other is that he is a chronic masturbator and is dropping load after load during the day while
surfing that forum. Which means of course that at anytime any of you have corresponded with
Jimmy, he has his pants around his ankles, his room smells of urine and sperm as he is done
wiping the man juice from his chest, chin and keyboard. Kinda makes you think about the next
time you respond to one of his posts...huh? Disgusting. Or Delightful. Depends on your
perspective. Opie is a study in psychology.....just watch him patrol these boards....look at his
interaction with our female members....downright creepy. You just know he has a hold of lil’
Jimmy and is timing his release with the moment their responses to his posts appear. But enough
with the Masturbation jokes.....this is a family forum. Opie...we love ya..you are a great poster
and are much appreciated...just put your dick away while you cruise these forums...will ya?
Promise?

Thank you and **** You all!!!!!!!!!!!

 

jeffrey ross killed that roast.

 

Nice touch with the fake dictionary definition.

 

not fake..it is an actual definition:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=frumundah

 

I thought you just said "dictionary" Not the UD, still funny though.

 

Two tips of the hat, boys.....

These two posts back to back....brilliant! You each saved this thread!

 

I will dedicate tonight to this thread and give it the attention it deserves.

 

I refuse to roast brother Opie...

 

Who ****ing told you that?! Ummmm, I mean... pffffttt.

 

What he meant to say was, "Samphin was a better Roast Emcee".