So everyone has seen "A Christmas Story". And is familiar with Ralphie's obsession with getting a Red Ryder BB gun for Christmas, in spite of protests that he would shoot his eye out. Right?
SI's latest "Tale of the Tape" has a humorous comparison between Ralphie ans Burress.

Tale of the Tape: Plaxico Burress vs. Ralphie - Extra Mustard - SI.com