OAKLAND---The Raiders may be experiencing sweeping changes but one thing will remain the same - they won't tell you about it. With the passing of legendary zombie Al Davis, the Raiders have had a power vacuum at the top. It is widely expected that Hue Jackson has been, partly because of his baffling personnel decisions, questionable game management, and abrasive attitude, but mostly because as HC of the Oakland Raiders, you just don't get a mani-pedi. DC Chuck Bresnahan is also expected to be let go because he looks like Corky from Life Goes On and coaches about as well. When contacted for confirmation, Raiders Senior Spokesman John Herrera simply said While issuing that statement, Hue Jackson and Corky were seen being escorted from the complex, Hue insisting he needed his last bottle of nail polish remover. Mark Davis when reached for comment: which was met swiftly with a comment from Alameda John Herrera Nothing is known about this new GM but he has yet to fire OC Al Saunders suggesting he will focus keeping the offence in place and overhauling the defence. It is expected he will trade older higher paid players to recoup some of the lost draft picks Hue Jackson traded for "That awesome shade of pink"
lol. Mark Davis makes the Beverly Hillbillies look like royalty. He looks like the guy who had his face chewed off by Hannibal Lecter is sporting a dirty blonde Lloyd from Dumb & Dumber toupee. By the way, will Jacoby Ford be available? I'm trying to build Clemson 2.0 in Buffalo. As you may or may not have noticed, I've already allocated a very small portion of Bill's press box seats in exchange for select future trades. Play your cards right and you could be a very lucky guy.
