http://www.theonion.com/articles/onion-sports-2010-nfl-teambyteam-guide,18023/?slide=3 AFC East Buffalo Bills Strength: Buffalo is well-known for its friendly locals, its world-famous wings, and its proximity to beautiful Niagara Falls Weakness: Once again pretty much centers around the entire roster Player To Watch: Starting quarterback Trent Edwards. Wait, him again? God, these guys are so f**ked Intangibles: The AFC East is, perhaps, the league's most talented division, making it the most respectable division to finish last in New England Patriots Strength: Bill Belichick has avoided stealing any wives recently, so he should be focused on the 2010 season; people are sure to tout the Patriots' experience and maturity as opposed to flat-out calling them old Weakness: Considering the talent of this year's rookie class, it's a shame that Belichick will once more work one of them until he dies Intangibles: Can't discount the possibility of another horrific injury to quarterback Tom Brady; oh, please, Lord, let there be another horrific injury to Tom Brady Biggest Question: This may be the year New England finally falls out of contention, but we know full well these ****s will pull a 12-4 season out of their *** somehow Miami Dolphins Strength: With a new big-name free agent and a talented young quarterback, Miami has the potential to disappoint like never before Weakness: A common sleeper pick among analysts; few things spell your demise quite as surely as that Player To Watch: LeBron James should play his first game at tight end roughly halfway through the season Intangibles: Already boasting loads of beautiful women and the NBA's most talented assemblage of players, Miami needs only to win the Super Bowl to really send a f**k-you to the rest of the nation New York Jets Strength: Rex Ryan is a coach who leads by example, an approach that has helped the Jets build one of the fattest offensive lines in the league Weakness: New Jet Santonio Holmes claimed to have a great weed connect, but after hooking teammates up with total schwag, he has lots of ground to make up Player To Watch: Quarterback Mark Sanchez, specifically his muscular thighs and perfectly sculpted *** Biggest Question: Why exactly is everyone so optimistic about this team in the preseason every single year? You have to admit that the "Miami has the potential to disappoint like never before" line is funny. Also love the one about the Jets "Why is everyone so optimistic about this team every preseason?" The Raiders and Bucs previews are the best I think.
Intangibles: The combination of T.O. and Ochocinco could make the Bengals so annoying at the receiver position that other teams forfeit to avoid playing them
i also enjoyed the end of the viking's talking about their secondary.."what's a cornerback??" and "who was supposed to cover that guy??".good stuff,maybe the mod's can merge the 3?
"After giving up 50 sacks in 2009, Green Bay's offensive line appears to have forgiven Aaron Rodgers for whatever he did "
Cheers for that, I really enjoyed it. Around the rest of the league, my particular favourites were the cowboys intangibles and the lions strengths.
I'm sorry, but these two had me rolling: Philadelphia Eagles * Weakness: With the loss of Brian Westbrook, the Eagles have a major hole at starting knee injury and concussion San Francisco 49ers * Player To Watch: Veteran Brian Westbrook is always a threat to explode into a cloud of ligaments and bone It's all about the delivery. The wording just left me with my sides hurting.
Chicago Bears Weakness: Lovie Smith spending majority of practice having players help him pack up his office Detroit Lions Strength: Since they play in the NFC North, this team should get two easy wins when facing the lowly Lions Kansas City Chiefs Weakness: Offense continues to struggle when trying to huddle up, with most of the players being overpowered and ending up on the ground Tennessee Titans Biggest Question: The Titans secondary must face Tony Romo, Donovan McNabb, and both Mannings this year; will they be able to keep themselves from attempting to get their autographs during games?
Tampa Bay Buccaneers- Weakness: Looking at this roster, it may not be the best year to play in a stadium where fans have access to several functioning cannons Arizona Cardinals- Strength: Superstar Larry Fitzgerald runs crisp routes, gets good separation, and watches helplessly as poorly thrown passes wobble to the turf
