here we go again

 

What are the odds we're the last team to hire a coach? Even though we fired Sparano to get a head start....who now has a brand new job, and he will be collecting more money from Ross, right? Sparano wins...considering the Jets will most likely finish in 2nd and contend for a wild card again while we talk about the draft in November.

Like it or not this team has become one of the bottom feeding, ugly duckling, red headed cousins of the NFL with the likes of the Browns and Bengals over the past 10 years. Used to be at the top...the Dolphins are what the Patriots and Saints will look at and say "this is what not to do if we want to stay at the top when our stars retire." The Bengals haven't won a playoff game since 1990...we're strutting down that path.

We went from being like the Steelers, Yankees, Candiens, Lakers (okay, with far less championships but with great, constant playoff teams and great exciting players) to a doormat and joke.

 

At one point the Patriots and the Saints were in the same boat. Saints used to be the biggest joke for over 20 years. One othe beauties of today's NFL is that it is much quicker to go from joke to joke teller.

 

If I had to guess...they are interviewing Young Schotty.

 

ouch

 

Ross said they have more candidates to interview but that they are gonna have to wait because some are coaching this weekend. Carmichael?

 

Clements.....please.

 

Maybe Zimmer will be making his 2nd interview. He is in Tampa right now I believe.

 

I know, Saints only won 1 playoff game from 1967-2005. I fear we might be going down a similar path. Not THAT bad, but not much better either.

 

A guy that they should make a candidate is Chuck Pagano, he is the DC in Baltimore.

Those players absolutely LOVE HIM, and his defenses are right inline with the personnel we have.

 

Steve Ross said he wants to interview a coach from one of the teams playing this weekend.

Philbin was interviewed, maybe he gets another look. Maybe Clements and Moss are who we are targeting.

Or Carmichael.

 

Regardless of whether or not it ends up being for the best, this is a freaking embarrassment. We can't finish a game and we can't close a deal.

 

Sadly, I don't think Ross knows exactly who is playing this weekend. I'm 80% certain he thinks the Colts are still in Baltimore.

 

If the Pats can hire coaches while they are still in the playoffs why should we have to wait to interview coaches that are still in them. I hope they keep the entire process a secret and save us all the embarassment.

 

Probably this guy. Sponge Bob has not returned calls.

 

I would take Shotty now over any of the other guys. At least he could get some decent asst. coaches in here.

 

Or Dennison

 

Hell man we cant even fire a coach right. Move this team to Buffalo and it all would make sense.

 

Mike McCoy from Denver I can see get an interview.

 

They are probably not releasing the name of who is getting interviewed because the Man does not WANT his name released. They have already stated it would be this way, so I doubt it is Taub(?). It is probably a college coach.

 

Classified Information

I have sources that are close to the situation and I can share some of the inside track info about this mystery coach with you all but the info has to remain inside this thread. If this were to leak out it could out the identity of my C.I. (confidential informant) and endanger him in a similar manner as AQ handled the David Pearle incident. So please keep this info just among us here in this thread.

The guy they are interviewing is named Rock. His surname is unknown because the mother is unsure who his father was. Apparently this guy was hand picked by Jeff Ireland. He has scouted him through his own personnel avenues outside of the organization. It seems that Jeff is part of the Big Brother program and this kid came up under Irelands wing. Jeff is his big brother and the only thing we know about him for sure is that his mom was a crack whore who use to sell her body to pay for her habit.

What I am liberty to divulge to you about him is that Jeff thinks very highly of him but they are hesitant to release any details about this hire until the team doctors are able to pass him on his physical (his urine sample is being questioned they think perhaps he tried to pass off a sample from a pregnant dogs as his own) and they are concerned that his agent may try to use another teams offer to leverage Ross into overpaying for this young and upcoming talent. They are being overly cautious this time around to save themselves the embarrassment of being rejected publicly for a 2nd time in this search.

I know this all sounds a bit out there but based on the reports I have heard on Rock, the entire organization, especially Ross are very excited at the possibility of being able to deliver this kid to Miami. He is said to have all the makings of being the next Don Shula. Both Ireland and Peterson are in agreement that this is the move that is going to usher in the next great Dolphins legacy era. They see this guy as being our HC for the next 40 or 50 years. Rock will be the face of the fins. Keep an eye out on Omars tweets he has sources close to the situation and he will most likely be the one to break the story once its ready to released officially. Just you remember you heard it from me first and keep it all hush, hush for right now!

:shifty:

 

The Rock is going to layeth the smacketh down on the NFL?

The Rock would have amazing locker room speeches

 

What's the problem with being the last to hire a coach, I couldn't care less about Fisher he's never won and big names never helped this team.
It's about getting the right guy not the first guy.
Sporano got fired because he was 0-7 they never interviewed a coach until the season was over.

 

Well every team we needed to lose, lost.

So they can interview:
Houston - Dennison
New Orleans - Carmichael
Denver - McCoy
Green Bay - Philbin, Clements, Moss

 

Actually, I wouldn't be at all surprised if this is where the clown-shoes side-show HC search ended up. Not for a second.

 

I could see it being Chip Kelly.

He wouldn't want his recruiting class to take a hit if he doesn't take the job. Plus, there were reports we reached out to his agent; which seemed strange compared to typical press release of "Miami Dolphins will talk to Chip Kelly."

I don't know what I would think about him. I know he uses a lot of statistical analysis in his games, which I love but I still think he used the crutch of talent at Oregon.

 

Fixed...I think?

 

lol!

 

Fixed even more :lol: