This is actually not the first time that a someone has posted something like this. Then, as now, the membership here pulled together to support. I hope that others who may be going through something as grave as this takes this evidence that they have support here. [ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVX5Dz7NV1c&feature=related"]YouTube - Ofra Haza - You've Got A Friend[/ame]
King Felix.... read this and take it to heart. take this seriously. get checked out . talk to a therapist. You never know what is exactly wrong with you. My cousin complained for years about suicidal thoughts and his mother ignored him and then passed it off as "craziness". He was later diagnosed as Bipolar, and since his mother was of the uncaring type..he let go of his medication and did not partake int he programs that were prescribed for him. he then had an episode, shot his girlfriend while she slept in the head, then shot himself in the mouth. This is serious business. Take care of yourself. Life is too precious.
well its not looking good to get any meds or meet with a physciatrist...its to much money that me or my family doesn't have...im so mad about that
Eric, Don't give up that easy. There must be a free clinic in your area that can give affordable or free medical help. I am PM'ing you what I found online. Raul
Please don't give up now. You've come a long way. You can do it, just hang on and keep fighting. Life is so precious we're all still here for you, you know that, so, keep posting or what ever it takes to get through this. My prayers are with you.
Brother no need to throw in the towel. There are ways to get you the medications and assistance to see the doctors as well. Keep your chin up! You got my numbers and can always pm me bro. We all have your health and happiness in our best interests!
We don't always agree but I have to tell you that there is no point in dying. I don't want this to be a religious debate, but here is my opinion (which you can take or leave) Once you die it's over. No matter how bad things may get, there is always a chance that you can make them better. If you try hard enough you WILL be successful and your life will be a good one. Even if everything in the world is stacked against you, there is always a reason to be here. Good luck, hopefully everything gets straight with you.
sigh...still no steps have been made since last post. now im looking around trying to buy xanax cuz i am home alone for the next week and have nothing to calm me, cuz i am out of the meds i got at the hospital...i did tell my therapist about what happened, and shes been checking up on me...
Eric - hang in there bro. I'm looking through my resources, trying to get you help. You're not alone - I'll be off and on AIM all day. If you IM me and I don't respond immediately, it just means I'm away from my computer, but I'll be back to it. We'll be checking on you. Keep safe - we care.
Brother you can turn those crappy cards into four of kind. Keep your chin up! Don't let a small set back knock you down. Got to get up, wipe the dust off and continue to get the needed help that you need. If I was in a better situation myself I would help you out, but I am having a tough time of it.
None of us are giving up on you, so you have to hang in there. Please take care and keep posting and letting us know how you are. My prayers are with you as always.
Hang in there bro. I have an unlimited messaging plan, text me all day on aim, Ill talk while Im at work if I have to. We'll figure out whats going on and how to help you. Just dont give up. If you want something calming try Yoga or meditation? Those dont cost you anything; just look them up online. Have you thought about what makes you happy? Your future plans?
Brother Eric you can always pm, email or text me, and I will call you back right away. We love you and wish you the very best. There is so much life in front of you to enjoy brother.
glad you posted this here about you being alone for the week and that you told your therapist as well. as others have said do not give up. all you need to do is ask and you've got a forum full of people who are willing to open their hearts up to you. gotta keep brushing the dust off as FFIC says. just because you are not winning the medication battle so far does not mean that you can't win the war. trust me man my mom takes things that no person should ever have to take. she's on a ****load of medications due to a back injury. grant it she's on medi(something) and a lot of it is funded but she still has co-pays out the wazoo. from time to time they've threatened to take this away from her and she's had to fight tooth and nail just to be on medications that without she wouldn't be able to live most likely. they're all pain blockers and things of that nature for her back; but it's the same principal. the gov't is all about money right now. they're in a hell of a debt. but that doesn't mean that you should be left high and dry because the pharmacies want their $$$ and the gov't isn't just willing to get you the assistance you need right away. medical assistance in this country is a joke. and it really pisses me off. keep checking around there is bound to be someone somewhere who can help you get what you need. until that point we are all here.
Brother Eric we know things are tough for you right now, but at anytime you need one of us, please contact us when ever you like. We are here for you, and want to help you through this tough challenge in your life.
Just listen to us and hold on. The Pastor is right. You take care and keep posting--do not--give up. There's too much life to live out there. You never know what will come up. My sister is struggling like crazy. She's an amputee and her jerk of a husband left. So now she's constantly staying on the phone to get all the aid and help she can. She's cut off everything except her electric and phone(and it's at the bare minimum). So, you hold fast, like I said, get busy and some one out there will help you. OK? WE care and love you here.
Really late to this thread, but I wanted to know how you were doing SeekingAnswers. I don't know If I can be of any help(I'm only 16 years old), but I would like to know If you are a religiois man? If not, try to be. Being Religious and asking God for help would benefit you alot. And Cnc66, I would be embarrassed If I ever complain about anything ever again. Your story was beyong amazing. How did you deal with all that?
by this iam guessing you got some rough patches again in your life bro? just so you know (you should know this by now) you have friends here....im glad you come here to seek help man. as soon as i saw you posted here, i wanted to tell you hi.....and let you know my pm box is always open to you....as is my aim.....if you ever need to just shoot the ****....or get something off your chest....im all ears man. look....alot of crazy crap happens when your young. i am 22.....not far off your age. i remember highschool and college.....and i remember some crazy things goin down.....if you need it....im here. always. im always on this site....so a pm wouldnt go un-read long. keep your chin up king....your loved here....and im sure got friends and fam that love you as well!!!
Keep you head on straight dude. I just finished walking barefoot through Hell the last week and let me tell you some days I didn't even want to get out of bed and face the day. But I did, and now I've got things somewhat under control again and things are looking a bit better. Life's a *****, but don't let that ***** beat you down.
Ups and downs come with life. Learning to live with each is how we get through it. If your sigh has a specific let me know and we can talk about it. Folks here will listen!
Ahh, sounds like you just discovered another bump in the road of life. It happens, we all go through it, I don't know of anyone who doesn't experience some sort of trouble on at least a semi-regular basis. Just keep your chin up, understand that there are people who care for you, people who you care for, and just take it one day at a time. Things are never as bad as they first appear or as tough to overcome as we think, if you need someone to listen and provide some advice you can hit me up. Stay positive brother.
I can't really add to what anyone has said here other than, if you need to talk, you know how to reach me bro.
Pick up the phone or PM, please! No one here will judge but we will listen. Take it one minute at a time. The very next minute may bring you a better way!
The fact that you have reached - out is already a big step. If your mind was made up you wouldn't see the therapist, or bother posting here. I am very young, and even though my road has been bumpier than perhaps the next kid my age, it is nowhere near what it could of been. I have been depressed, my depression was not on the level of yours, so I would be lieying if I told you that I know what you going thru. I do not that depression sucks, and the key is to stay positive. No matter how bad today is, and tomorrow seems, tommorow is a new day and new opporunities. There are always people that care. Always. Im not sure if you are a religious person, if you are, good for you! Go speak to a pastor and try to explain your situation. If you are not, try to speak to anybody. What you are doing right now, is already great. Communication, and the positive attitude is the key. Whenever you feel bad, sad, depressed...think of people who have it worse. Look at what Marty had to go thru, and he knows thats bad, but he also knows that there is always people in worse situation. I can't see you, but from the fact that you post here, I at very least can assume you that you are at least somewhat healthy. You have two arms, two legs, aren't missing any limibs (im assuming) you have eyesight and you can hear. There a re MILLIONS of people in this world who are blind, deaf, or missing arms or legs, but they haven't given up. No matter how bad it seems, there are always people who are in deeper sh#$#t than you are. That doesn't mean that waht you are going thru is not bad, it just means that there is hope. Smile more, find reasons to. Look at the support you are getting here. People care, there are more good people than bad people, in the end,the good wins. There are people who care. AA, drug help, rehab, government...whatver you suffer from, there are people who are willing to help, as long as you are willing to help yourself, you will be fine. I promise.
I think you should volunteer with a charity. Look for a soup kitchen, Habitat for Humanity, an animal rescue, etc. Find the time and a charity that does work you can do and message you agree with. Nothing, and I mean nothing, can re-center your focus and thoughts, like making a positive impact in others people's lives...especially those that may be less fortunate than yourself. If this is something you might be interested in and would like some help finding the right match, just PM me and we'll find you a good place to help at.
thanks bro good idea, what kinda volunteering can one do with kids? ive looked into being a "big brother" for children who are going through chemo a few months back, but never actually did it... anyways, yeah today was the last time i met with my therapist. which sucks, because since this thread was posted i really opened up to my therapist..she kept talking about the emotions of not meeting with her and i kinda just blew it off like i'm a man, ill be okay not seeing you anymore...well i was right that im still okay, but damn. i didnt realize it was gonna hit me that hard i wasnt gonna see her anymore. shes really the only person i can talk too. theres my mom but somethings you just cant tell your mother. and to be honest, i dont really trust anyone else around me....but i will have a new one in september..also in september i will be finally getting some medicine. whats been getting me is my relationship with my ex. we started talking again recently, which is stupid on my part but i cant help it...shes hit a rough patch and i wanted to tell her that im there for her. but every time i try to be there for her, my feelings get in the way and i ruin the whole conversation, cuz ill say something about my feelings for her..which either ends up in a fight or she just ignores it and it eats me inside. we haven't been together since January, and i think every day i fall in more love with her..everyone says get a new one, that way you'll get over the old one. i wish i could do that but i cant be with someone if all my feelings are for someone else. the worst part is she wants nothing to do with me. she was talking today about being old and lonely, knowing i'd do whatever it takes to be with her....... i've also noticed that i am extremely annoyed by everyone in my life. i cant conversate with someone for a period of time before im thinking in my head "just shut up already"...i hide it, i never actually tell some to shut up, but by hiding i think its making me angrier..... honestly right now i feel how i did when i started this thread
I am not sure why you are getting a new therapist and why it will take until September??? The stuff with your ex is quite normal. It is wrong of her to use you while you are vulnerable None of us can put our feelings entirely on the shelf, it is that when healthy we learn to deal with them better. You are having completely appropriate feelings but just having trouble working with them. In the short term, I still urge you to find someone to talk with. Worst case, live on here as much as you can and immerse yourself in the minutiae of training camp. It will give you a point of focus. Oh and as to wanting to tell others to "shut up", I feel that way very often and my job is to listen to others! Seriously, it is hard not to feel that way when you are over whelmed. It is OK.
You keep holding on. You're going to be ok. You have us to talk to and vent on, even if it is the net. I think with the old girlfriend it may be that it's more comfortable because it's familiar to you and that's why you hang on to that relationship. Try your hardest not to re-visit old issues and keep going forward. Right now you don't need to put up with some one else dumping their stuff on you. I promise you I know how you feel. Standing up for yourself is hard, but you have to do it to stay healthy. Try to stay away from others that bring you down. I'm in this process right now and it is hard, but I'm to the point where the people that are downers are there just to take me down with them. We all need peace in out lives and I pray for you to find that. I'm here if you need to talk, ok?
i think you should volunteer as well. be a big brother to someone. maybe volunteer for something sports related since you are into sports. if neither of those things just look something up. fill your time. keep yourself busy. that is key. that is part of the reason why i am training to do 50 miles. it keeps me focused on a goal and if i play my cards right i hope to get donations from people for http://www.civilwar.org . afterwards i will feel accomplished and like i helped out a worthy cause. about your therapist i also wonder why you are changing therapists. a money issue maybe? losing someone you've grown close to in a personal or professional manner can hurt more than you initially thought it was. you've just gotta open up to the new one like you did the old one. it'll take time again but their purpose is the same.. to help you out. i know you were fond of the other one and i'm sure it helped that she was a younger therapist that you could relate to instead of some older person who you might think has nothing in common with your times and your troubles. about your ex.. you know i am friends with my ex too. i still do have feelings for her as well. the same ones you are talking about (not as strong though). i have been single since sept./oct. of last year. i am the most hopelessly romantic person you will probably ever "meet". i always, always, always think relationships can be worked out.. or should at least try to be worked out. i wonder how i'm going to be with someone else because i still think back and remember the person that she is and that i do care for her and still do love her as a person.. true love never goes away. i have told her that i love her as a friend and as a person.. she just knows as well as i do that there is no way in hell a relationship would ever work out. i want some qualities in future relationships that she brought, sure.. my ex understands me more than most people i know. sometimes things bother me about it too. and i sometimes have to give myself a reality check and say "i don't have to worry about feeling that way anymore because it is not my obligation to feel that way". and even sometimes i worry maybe i'm too attached. maybe i'm holding too many feelings over from the relationship to make a friendship work. i've even thought of telling her i don't think i can talk to her a few times. but then i settle down and realize that she's not perfect and there were a decent bit of things that she did that really, really hurt me. cheating on me several times comes to mind immediately. keeping myself busy also keeps my mind less busy and i find that these worries go away. it was just something to do with idle time. i know that there is someone out there who will not do that to me and can make a long lasting relationship with me. i look forward to that person coming into my life. but for right now i'm doing my damndest to enjoy being single. it is fun when you get right down to it. and being in a relationship is not the most important nor only thing a life should be. anyway, my point to all this rambling about my situation and my friendship with my ex is that you have to see if it works for you. if you feel like the friendship is causing you more pain than it is joy you need to cut off the connection. it will hurt like a ***** now but if you keep the connection and let it keep affecting you like it is week in and week out your life will be a mess. you have to weigh out the cost of the friendship to your life and judge whether or not if it's best for you. you need to do what's best for you regardless of how much it may initially hurt. you are the only one with you all day every day. i am glad you are getting meds soon and sad that you have to see a new therapist. the only thing i can really say about your friendship with your ex is that you need to ask yourself is: how high is the cost to my physical and emotional well being to be friends? too high? you gotta stop talking to her. if it's just a passing thing and you think it will go away (honestly, not lying) then continue being friends. edit: it also might help if you stop telling her your feelings for her. after you have gone thru the relationship she knows. she knows you are still there for her because you literally still are there for her. also, i don't know if you do this but try not to think that everything she does relates to you in some way shape or form. this is unnecessary. for most things.. if you can control it take control and do something about it and make it better. if you can't.. you need to stop concerning yourself with it. you know where the PM box and the AIM box is. oh, and quit telling me to shut up mentally
I think you should probably help coach a youth sport. Helping with cancer kids, while noble, may be a bit out of your league, at this point in time. Please don't take offense to that, its just that terminally ill children need endless amounts of optimism, and obviously, that isn't where you're at...yet. The local YMCA is a good place to start looking for volunteer opportunities with youth sports. If that doesn't pan out, we'll find you more places to look into.
Wow everyone has great things to say and I want to encourage everyone here with my story. It's not much and it may not be as spectacular but I hope it touches someone. My goals in life is to inflluence and impact everyone I meet and come in contact with. The other is have a real and passionate relationship with Jesus Christ. I am not here to bash anyone with my faith but that is what I believe. Anyway here is my story and I hope it helps someone: When I was 6 years old, I had a very strong stuttering problem. It was hard to make a sound or say a word. Whenever I tried to I would shake or open my mouth to have nothing come out. Because of this I would be made fun of and I would isolate myself from people so I wouldn't have to speak. I was pretty smart growing up and so people used to use me to pass their classes so they would look good with the teachers but they didn't care about me. I couldn't keep friends for anything so I didn't care of if they did that to me because I wanted to be around people. My friendships lasted the longest about two weeks if I was lucky. I tried several times to commit suicide in my life and I would get so close and God would intervene in so many ways. I just didn't want to be here anymore but I felt God was telling me that I was loved by Him and I was worth so much to him. I have a purpose and he had a plan for me that was made only for me and no one else. Only I could fufill that purpose and if I don't do it, it will never get done. It is something that will change the world for the good and God has given me the ability to do it. So that made me feel special that cared for me to place me in this world to impact it like that. God loves you and cares for you. There is a reason you are still here and you have an opportunity to change the world around you. I know this is really long but I hope that something in this was helpful. God bless you.
Wonderful post. Thank you so much for sharing with us. I love to here others testimonies and yours is very inspiring.
