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Thinking of moving to Seattle..

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by Nappy Roots, Jun 9, 2010.

  1. Nappy Roots

    Nappy Roots Well-Known Member

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    Well my gf whom I live with has a phone interview tomorrow for a job in Seattle that will be more money and better opportunity for her. So she wants me to come naturally. But I've lived in Bradenton,FL my entire life. All my friends and family is here. I watch sports with these friends. I play on a softball team with them. I play basketball with them. I make almost daily trips to see my mom and 5 year old brother. Man how I would miss him.

    How do you give all that up to move completely across the country? She's excited, but sad I'm not excited. I haven't told her either which way, and I do love her. But I love my life. I don't know that I can give it up for a female when there are so many out there? I don't know what to think at this point....
     
  2. finsincebirth

    finsincebirth Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    Is this girl wife material and do you see a future with her? If not I don't think it's worth it for just another girl. If yes then you should consider it IMO. You'll have to leave your hometown sometime, and you can always make new friends even though it may be hard in the beginning. And I know it'd suck leaving your mom and brother but it has to happen at some point.
     
  3. JimToss

    JimToss Thank You Chad Pennington

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    To be absolutely honest you really need to define what "more money and better opportunity is." Not to us, but to your girlfriend, and yourself.

    I would probably argue anything not a significant pay raise. isn't worth moving your life across the country for. Think about it in terms of promotion. With her current job would she be within a promotion of making the same pay? Assume a 10-15% raise for a promotion.
    There are probably jobs a lot closer that would probably pay comparable amounts.

    You are the same age as me, and will assume your girl is in the same range. Although jumping on the first job offered (especially in this economy) certainly is tempting, but may not be worth it. Now if this is literally the top notch company in her field to work in, it may be worth the move.

    As the previous poster mentioned. You have to be sure that the girl is certainly wife material. Not to question your devotion but when you say "give it up for a female, because there are so many out there" really makes me suspect. At least in my eyes, when it comes to my fiancee, there is only one of her out there. But, I may just be whipped. I am also reading what I see on a message board which certainly doesn't convey the whole story, and may be completely off base of what you truly mean. So feel free to disregard my statement if I read too far into a statement, that you really meant nothing by.

    As far as your friends go. They most likely will not be staying around the area their whole lives. They will likely also be moving on so that should not be the breaking point. The family on the other hand is a different story.

    I personally had to move 3 hours away from my home after graduating college. My fiancee followed. But, 3 hours is a lot different then 2500 miles.
     
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  4. Dol-Fan Dupree

    Dol-Fan Dupree Tank? Who is Tank? I am Guy Incognito. Club Member

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    chances are if you do it for her, and you do not like it, you will probably come to resent her.

    Seattle is OK. I am mostly from this area though. People are nice, however not very friendly.
     
  5. NaboCane

    NaboCane Banned

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    Growing up in Miami, it was always my dream to move to San Francisco or Seattle. Through a confluence of events, I landed in Seattle 15 years ago and never looked back.

    I rank Seattle among the world's greatest cities...most of the time.

    You won't find any other city in the US within 4 hours' drive from all of a desert, a rainforest, mountains and an ocean. The range and scope of the natural beauty is awe-inspiring. And the Summers are amazing.

    But it rains. Often. Although, in sum total not the sheer volume you get in a typical Florida Summer. But in Fall and Winter, even when it isn't raining it's usually gray and overcast.

    A few years back we had a period of over 90 days in which it rained, non-stop. Now, that doesn't happen often, but it can. And even if it's not that severe, I have known friends who couldn't take more than 3 Winters here before they moved away.

    You have to be able to shrug it off; if you absolutely can't, you'll be miserable.

    Oh, and we have a crunchy-granola birkenstock-wearing Mayor right now who seems to want to roll back the clock and turn all the roads into bicycle paths. That's annoying.
     
  6. SICK

    SICK Lounge Moderator

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    dont do it dude. you'll have to pay for nfl ticket, youll have no friends, youll be miserable.....and then she'll probably end up leaving you for a kurt cobain look alike. and youll be ****ed.

    just being the "devil on your shoulder" so to speak.

    but seriously....i grew up and lived in south florida my entire life. 2 years ago i moved up here to charlotte nc. 3 hours from mountains, 3 hours from beach.....cool area, nice people, cheaper to live. (i never go to the beach, and never go to the mountains. they are just ****ing mountains.)

    fast forward to "now" and i hate it. i love it being cheaper. but is that worth our happiness? wifey and i are both depressed about it. she grew up in south fla also.

    i am a very personable guy. funny, out going and i think and have heard easy to get along and be friends with. well ive been here 2 1/2 years and i have 1 friend. and he moved here after i did.

    Its easier where iam from, i grew up with my friends, went to prom with my friends, partied with my friends....so its natural to keep hanging out. iam "grandfathered" into the group so to speak. now in your 20's its harder to blend in with some friends in a new place, expecially when i have a 2 year old and a wife.

    i hate it here. i miss florida like ****ing crazy. i pay to watch dolphins games now and cant afford to watch marlin games.....its depressing, it was natural to just flip on the tube down there and watch the game. no worries. now its added issues. cheaper insurance? yeah. cheaper rent? sure. nothing to do, no friends, and ****ty freezing ice in winter? yup.

    so think about all this **** before you do it. luckily for me....wifey hates it too, and i will give it 3 years before we're back in either orlando or west palm.

    (seriously we have a 3 year plan to get back down there, gunna save, and do it right)

    just make sure this chick is "long haul" material before you move across the country dude. you know that.
     
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  7. NaboCane

    NaboCane Banned

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    Oh yeah, BTW...I moved here with my GF of the time, we drove out over a 3-week period; I think 3 feet over the Seattle city limit we broke up.
     
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  8. Muck

    Muck Throwback Uniform Crusader Retired Administrator

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    Good advice here.

    If she isn't wife material, you shouldn't do it. Simple as that.

    She's the sole reason you're considering sacrificing everything else you hold dear. Make sure it's a good enough reason.
     
  9. gunn34

    gunn34 I miss Don & Dan

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    I hear the donuts there are really great.
     
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  10. Pagan

    Pagan Metal & a Mustang

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    Bottom line, you're insane if you do it.

    Hate to say it but you're 24, you're too young to uproot your life for a woman.

    Take it from someone who ****ed up and did it.
     
  11. Finsanity

    Finsanity New Member

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    RAIN RAIN and more RAIN. That all it does in Seattle. I have family who live there. My aunt family moved from Los Angeles to Seattle for the same reason as your girl. Better paying job. But they moved there with another family (brother in law). So they werent alone plus she left because they offered her 150k. That kind of money is some serious motivation to make the move.
     
  12. m ino

    m ino New Member

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    seattle has the best donut shops in the world.when you get there look up this kid golden tate and he will hook you up!!the donuts alone are worth the move.
     
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  13. Tone_E

    Tone_E Season Ticket Holder Club Member

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    I personally think the way you feel about your situation back home will ultimately drive you to resent your girl as Dol-Fan-Dupree suggested. I think this will happen even if you love her. From your post you aren't ready to leave, and I don't blame you.

    And don't think you are being selfish either. I think it is a lot more for your girl to ask you to leave all of that behind for her instead of you asking her to stay for you.
     
  14. bigbry

    bigbry Huge Member

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    If you are even thinking this...then stay put.
     
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  15. Stitches

    Stitches ThePhin's Biggest Killjoy Luxury Box

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    So because it didn't work out for you that means it won't work out for him?

    I mean there are plenty of reasons to not do it or to do it, but if he goes it doesn't by any means make him insane (nor is he necessarily too young).
     
  16. Stitches

    Stitches ThePhin's Biggest Killjoy Luxury Box

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    I'd agree with this.
     
  17. Nappy Roots

    Nappy Roots Well-Known Member

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    A lot of great advice here. Is she wifey material. Yes. I wouldn't be with her if she wasn't. I've had one girl friend since high school, I loved my single life. But I couldn't pass her up.

    But just because of that I can't imagine giving up that for a female period.

    I'm glad someone said it wouldn't be selfish, because I was really worried about that fact
     
  18. Pagan

    Pagan Metal & a Mustang

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    No...it wouldn't work because he wouldn't be moving there because HE wants to, he'd be moving there because she got a job there. That NEVER works.

    It's called common sense.

    And yes he is too young, as are you. 24-25 isn't what it used to be 40-50 years ago.

    You're young. Enjoy it while you have it. Most people I know who do something like this or get married that young start getting the itch around 30-35 years old, cause they didn't get to do what they should have done when they had the chance.

    But you know...us old folks don't know ****. I know cause I thought the same thing when I was 25. Then I got older and realized what an *** I was and that I should have listened to some of the advice I got.

    Don't worry, that day will eventually come for you too. :wink2:
     
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  19. Ray Finkle

    Ray Finkle Member

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    While everyone here is giving some really good advice I think a picture or two of her would also help us help you on the decision (just kidding).

    Seriously though a big question that no one has brought up so far is will you be able to find a job in Seattle that you'd be happy with and do you think you'd be happy living there with the possibly of being with her all the time without any real friends for awhile and possibly ever.

    Basically what would you do with your life once you moved there and would you be happy.
     
  20. Stitches

    Stitches ThePhin's Biggest Killjoy Luxury Box

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    Go on... :shifty:
     
  21. GridIronKing34

    GridIronKing34 Silently Judging You Club Member

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    You're making a huge generalization about everyone in general IMO. You're treating this as a "square peg into a square hole, fits every time" type situation.

    But you know, us young folks are just ignorant fools so what do I know...

    As to nappy, just follow your intuitions... I don't see it as being selfish if you stay put...
     
  22. Pagan

    Pagan Metal & a Mustang

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    No bro, I'm not generalizing, I'm betting the odds. Seen it happen WAY too many times, and back when people DID marry young.

    He'd literally be giving up his entire life to move to the opposite end of the country where he knows no one and nothing. Sounds good on paper.

    Try it.
     
  23. bigbry

    bigbry Huge Member

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    Nappy,
    Another way of looking at this is if she goes by herself and then both of you still really need each other then I'm pretty certain the roads and planes will still be there.
    Could be a very good test on so many different levels.
    Discuss.
     
  24. HardKoreXXX

    HardKoreXXX Insensitive to the Touch

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    I wouldn't do it. Basically, she is moving for her, not you. That's fine and all, but she's basically forcing you to make a decision. It's unfair really. IF she was really in love with you, and wanted to marry you, she'd stay put knowing your family is there and you don't want to move.

    Not saying she's being selfish, sometimes career oppurtinites are hard to pass up. I know, because I moved from Southwest Florida to South Florida for a job 4 years ago. I actually broke up with a girl to do it because I didn't think it was fair I ask her to move (and she didn't want to move anyway).
     
  25. Jeff

    Jeff A.S.E. Mastur

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    Well you say she is wifey material, then why not? It doesnt have to be a permanent move. If you have the financial means to do it, I'd say try it out. You could always move back, right?
     
  26. Samphin

    Samphin Κακό σκυλί ψόφο δεν έχει

    Send her on her way and boink her sister/best friend/cousin/mother.

    That is what I did anyways

    I am miserable.
     
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  27. Samphin

    Samphin Κακό σκυλί ψόφο δεν έχει

    Actually...I do it quite often...but my plan a long time ago was to have an umbrella of my semen covering the northern hemisphere...
     
  28. Nappy Roots

    Nappy Roots Well-Known Member

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    Well we'll see. I doubt she would go if I didn't go. That's one reason I feel a little selfish. But I had a convo with her today, pretty long one. I basically said, why not stay in Florida. I told her I would go anywhere in Florida. But moving across the country is not something I really wanted to do.

    She's in fashion so she says that there are no big corporate fashion places in Florida, just on the west coast and east coast, like NY and NJ. I doubt that but whatever...we'll see what happens at this point.

    BTW here is some pictures of me and her from Halloween, I was a gyno, and a couple of her

    Just don't tell her...:shifty: she thinks its weird already that I'm on this forum all the time..
     

    Attached Files:

  29. Samphin

    Samphin Κακό σκυλί ψόφο δεν έχει

    More images needed those ones are all blurry and full of clothes...
     
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  30. Nappy Roots

    Nappy Roots Well-Known Member

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    Here's the other 2
     

    Attached Files:

  31. Nappy Roots

    Nappy Roots Well-Known Member

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    ...
     

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  32. Samphin

    Samphin Κακό σκυλί ψόφο δεν έχει

    Okay, I have made up my mind. You are not allowed to move to Seattle. Otherwise, you will be too close to your twin in Aqua4Ever04. The resemblence is pretty uncanny, to be honest.

    And please don't ruin anymore pictures of hot chicks with your mug. :wink2:
     
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  33. Nappy Roots

    Nappy Roots Well-Known Member

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    Haha are they blurry? I'm posting them from my phone that's y...I dunno how to do it clean from here
     
  34. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh Club Member

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    If you're not willing to give up your lifestyle for your woman, then it means you prefer it over her. Which is fine, life is too short to be unhappy, but it means she isn't the one. If she was the one, there'd be no contest. Since she's not the one, don't do it.
     
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  35. Stitches

    Stitches ThePhin's Biggest Killjoy Luxury Box

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    :yes:
     
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  36. Stringer Bell

    Stringer Bell Post Hard, Post Often Club Member

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    Whats the worst that happens? You move to Seattle, don't like it, and move back to FL in 6-12 months?

    I think its a good opportunity to see a different part of the world.
     
  37. dolphinkev

    dolphinkev Active Member

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    That's a very pretty lady to give up to stay home and be with family and friend, I would probaly give it a shot and see another part of this country and see how it goes. You can always come home if it doesn't work out, just remember that.
     
  38. King Felix

    King Felix chasing the high Club Member

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    Agree'd.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
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  39. jetssuck

    jetssuck I hear Mandich's voice...

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    He's concerned mostly with leaving his family..............that's hardly "lifestyle"

    Another thing is that he knows she won't go without him. Makes it easier to say no.....

    I understand that you're trying to help the guy but giving his gf an online litmus test and then saying "nope, not the one for you"? I mean come on, you don't know either one of them

    The fact is, he could be madly in love with this girl and still feel obligated not to leave his family.....
     
  40. Fin D

    Fin D Sigh Club Member

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    And yet he dedicates the same if not more space to the lifestyle aspect of it. Friends, sports, watching football, etc. Hence my point. I'm not saying it shouldn't be hard, but if you really love a significant other, you aren't this conflicted.

    Really? I'd think if you really loved someone that would make it harder to say no.

    And yet he asked for opinions from people on this board. I gave mine. Like all of us, we give opinions based on how we see things. That's sorta what an opinion is, you know.

    Sure he could be. He could not be too. A bird could spontaneously generate from a soda can. Somethings are more likely than others however. Generally speaking, when a person is madly in love with someone, they'll move for them.
     

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