Why are we not allowed to spank our children anymore when they deserve it?...

"Unlucky 13 wrote:

I have two girls. The oldest will be 4 in a few months, the youngest is 16 months. I have never, and will never spank/hit my children. Not once.

As with all kids, they will sometimes act up or out, and do things that they should not. I really, really hate raising my voice, but I do on occasion. The most I will ever do is pick my older daughter up and carry her away from the situation and put her in a chair for time out.

The important thing to remember is that kids don't think the same way that adults do, and as a parent, you always need to try and put yourself into their shoes. It can be hard, but parenting is hard. Spanking/hitting/beating is the coward's way out. A real man never hurts women or children.

Good for you, but don't call me a "coward" or not a "real man" because I've dared to swat any of my kids rear ends on occasion. If you're spanking and causing real pain, you're doing it wrong anyway.

I was beaten as a child. Belts, switches, wooden spoons. Didn't happen often, but it hurt. I don't take that road at all.

My kids will never deal with any of that, and my kids have no fear of me. None, nada, zip, zilch.

"Den54 wrote:

I never layed a hand on my son either while he was growing up. It was never in the playbook and he grew into a fine young man.
It's better to be respected then feared as a parent imo.

I have two teenage daughters and a preteen son. I have their respect, love and trust. They never have to worry that I'm going to hurt them. They come to me if they have problems and I am glad I have that kind of relationship with them, because they know they can come to me with anything.

The woman in the video above was not spanking. She was straight beating her son. That's not acceptable, IMO.

"Ohio Fanatic wrote:

yes, it's called common sense.

Bulls**t. Show me a link to a real study. I showed you 3...

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"Colorado Dolfan wrote:

Good for you, but don't call me a "coward" or not a "real man" because I've dared to swat any of my kids rear ends on occasion. If you're spanking and causing real pain, you're doing it wrong anyway.

I was beaten as a child. Belts, switches, wooden spoons. Didn't happen often, but it hurt. I don't take that road at all.

My kids will never deal with any of that, and my kids have no fear of me. None, nada, zip, zilch.

I have two teenage daughters and a preteen son. I have their respect, love and trust. They never have to worry that I'm going to hurt them. They come to me if they have problems and I am glad I have that kind of relationship with them, because they know they can come to me with anything.

The woman in the video above was not spanking. She was straight beating her son. That's not acceptable, IMO.

What should she have done? She probably saved his life. If my son was doing that I would have whooped his ass up and down the street just like his mom did. He deserved it.

EDIT: Even the Chief of Police in Baltimore commended her and hoped more moms would take control of their children like she did...

"CashInFist wrote:

What should she have done? She probably saved his life. If my son was doing that I would have whooped his ass up and down the street just like his mom did. He deserved it.

EDIT: Even the Chief of Police in Baltimore commended her and hoped more moms would take control of their children like she did...

Question: if I see a random kid doing something really ****ing stupid and beat the **** out of him "to save his life" is that okay? ...or are only parents allowed to beat the crap out of their kids?

Maybe next time she can use a bat, perhaps break his legs so he CAN'T go do stupid ****...

Just trying to take control of the situation and save a life, after all...

That's NOT spanking, that's NOT discipline. That's using force to control behavior.

"Colorado Dolfan wrote:

Question: if I see a random kid doing something really ****ing stupid and beat the **** out of him "to save his life" is that okay? ...or are only parents allowed to beat the crap out of their kids?

Maybe next time she can use a bat, perhaps break his legs so he CAN'T go do stupid ****...

Just trying to take control of the situation and save a life, after all...

That's NOT spanking, that's NOT discipline. That's using force to control behavior.

Yes. Only parents should be allowed.

As for the rest of your post? It's nonsense...

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"CashInFist wrote:

Yes. Only parents should be allowed.

As for the rest of your post? It's nonsense...

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Of course it's nonsense. So is the idea that it's okay to BEAT your children into compliance.

If she was doing the same thing with a belt, is it okay? Wooden spoon? A switch? A broom handle? Frying pan? Where does it stop being discipline and start being abuse?

If you're doing something to your child that he could fight back against a total stranger and be okay because it was obviously self defense, you're beating and not spanking. Period.

"Colorado Dolfan wrote:

Of course it's nonsense. So is the idea that it's okay to BEAT your children into compliance.

If she was doing the same thing with a belt, is it okay? Wooden spoon? A switch? A broom handle? Frying pan? Where does it stop being discipline and start being abuse?

If you're doing something to your child that he could fight back against a total stranger and be okay because it was obviously self defense, you're beating and not spanking. Period.

She was saving her son's life.

I'm pretty sure this was an extenuating circumstance here. Don't you think?

How would you have handled it?

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"CashInFist wrote:

She was saving her son's life.

I'm pretty sure this was an extenuating circumstance here. Don't talk think?

How would you have handled it?

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Don't know how I would've handled it. My kids wouldn't be in that situation, so I guess I'm lucky.

As for extenuating circumstances: If someone else had happened to intervene on her behalf and do the exact same thing she did, to save the young man's life, would it be okay? Let's say it's not even a stranger... How about an uncle, cousin, older sibling, best friend, trusted neighbor?

The law says no.

If you say no to any of them, you have to say no to mom doing the same thing, IMO.

"Colorado Dolfan wrote:

Don't know how I would've handled it. My kids wouldn't be in that situation, so I guess I'm lucky.

As for extenuating circumstances: If someone else had happened to intervene on her behalf and do the exact same thing she did, to save the young man's life, would it be okay? Let's say it's not even a stranger... How about an uncle, cousin, older sibling, best friend, trusted neighbor?

The law says no.

If you say no to any of them, you have to say no to mom doing the same thing, IMO.

C'mon man. Stop dodging. If that WAS your son, what would you have done? Stop skating...

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My son is right here now reading it with me and said that he would have deserved a worse ass beating than the Baltimore riot boy got if he was doing that.

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"Colorado Dolfan wrote:

Good for you, but don't call me a "coward" or not a "real man" because I've dared to swat any of my kids rear ends on occasion. If you're spanking and causing real pain, you're doing it wrong anyway.

I was beaten as a child. Belts, switches, wooden spoons. Didn't happen often, but it hurt. I don't take that road at all.

My kids will never deal with any of that, and my kids have no fear of me. None, nada, zip, zilch.

Honest question....if you never caused pain when you did it, then how did it work or what was the point?

"CashInFist wrote:

C'mon man. Stop dodging. If that WAS your son, what would you have done? Stop skating...

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Not dodging or skating. I'll cross that line if I ever get to it. I don't expect I will.

Mom in the video failed to instill the common sense into her son while he was growing up and is paying the price for it now. My kids won't get that out of hand because of the way I've raised them up to this point. I don't expect your son would either. You seem to keep him pretty well grounded.

If it gets to that point, though, you have a plan. I don't. I believe that my kids respect and trust me enough to sit down and talk about it if it comes to that point, though.

What I won't do, however, is allow my kids to believe that that kind of beating is normal behavior. No matter who is doing the beating.

"Colorado Dolfan wrote:

Not dodging or skating. I'll cross that line if I ever get to it. I don't expect I will.

Mom in the video failed to instill the common sense into her son while he was growing up and is paying the price for it now. My kids won't get that out of hand because of the way I've raised them up to this point. I don't expect your son would either. You seem to keep him pretty well grounded.

If it gets to that point, though, you have a plan. I don't. I believe that my kids respect and trust me enough to sit down and talk about it if it comes to that point, though.

What I won't do, however, is allow my kids to believe that that kind of beating is normal behavior. No matter who is doing the beating.

How do you know that she didn't? Peer pressure is a pretty hard thing to overcome. And you still didn't say how you would have handled it if that was YOUR son out there rioting. I'd really like to know.

"Fin D wrote:

Honest question....if you never caused pain when you did it, then how did it work or what was the point?

Honestly, it's a simple attention grab. It was reserved for something that could hurt them badly. Quick swat that startles them a bit is much better than the burn that would have occurred if they actually grabbed onto the stove or the shock if they got the key into the electrical outlet. That sort of thing... Like I said, didn't happen often...

"CashInFist wrote:

How do you know that she didn't? Peer pressure is a pretty hard thing to overcome. And you still didn't say how you would have handled it if that was YOUR son out there rioting. I'd really like to know.

True, peer pressure is tough sometimes. That's why I make myself available to talk to my kids about anything. They're less likely to fall in with the wrong crowd because I'm doing my job properly.

Like I said before, I don't know what I'd do. Honestly, though, it's a situation I am not likely to ever find myself in, so I don't worry about it. Ask my wife and you may get a totally different response because she worries about everything.

"Colorado Dolfan wrote:

True, peer pressure is tough sometimes. That's why I make myself available to talk to my kids about anything. They're less likely to fall in with the wrong crowd because I'm doing my job properly.

Like I said before, I don't know what I'd do. Honestly, though, it's a situation I am not likely to ever find myself in, so I don't worry about it. Ask my wife and you may get a totally different response because she worries about everything.

It seems like nobody on either side of the aisle of this debate will even answer honestly (except me - I would beat his ass). I don't know if they're scared to answer or what? LOL

I'm pretty sure I'll never have to worry about being in that situation the same as you. I have a wonderful son and I instilled good morals into his life since birth. I just wish others would come out and say what they would do in that woman's situation. I think she's a HERO. (or is it HEROINE?) .

I would not beat my kid in front of a crowd unless they were in the middle of sticking a knife into someone.

I will say that nothing can absolutely prevent your kids from doing stupid stuff under peer pressure situation, but good parents like myself that talk to their children all the time about not succumbing to peer pressure and not being motivated by popularity, dramatically decrease the odds.

"Ohio Fanatic wrote:

I would not beat my kid in front of a crowd unless they were in the middle of sticking a knife into someone.

I will say that nothing can absolutely prevent your kids from doing stupid stuff under peer pressure situation, but good parents like myself that talk to their children all the time about not succumbing to peer pressure and not being motivated by popularity, dramatically decrease the odds.

So, what would you have done?

"CashInFist wrote:

She was saving her son's life.

I'm pretty sure this was an extenuating circumstance here. Don't you think?

How would you have handled it?

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She still could have grabbed him without pummeling him. Restraining is not the same as beating. I don't think anyone is saying you cannot be physical with your child. Striking is the issue correct?

"Two Tacos wrote:

She still could have grabbed him without pummeling him. Restraining is not the same as beating. I don't think anyone is saying you cannot be physical with your child. Striking is the issue correct?

You guys are living in a fantasy world. Do you think she should have tackled him instead? LOL

"Ohio Fanatic wrote:

I would not beat my kid in front of a crowd unless they were in the middle of sticking a knife into someone.

I will say that nothing can absolutely prevent your kids from doing stupid stuff under peer pressure situation, but good parents like myself that talk to their children all the time about not succumbing to peer pressure and not being motivated by popularity, dramatically decrease the odds.

So you DO have a breaking point where you WOULD beat your kid when they deserve it. That again was my point...

"CashInFist wrote:

So you DO have a breaking point where you WOULD beat your kid when they deserve it. That again was my point...

No one deserves to be beaten. Ever. Especially kids.

"CashInFist wrote:

You guys are living in a fantasy world. Do you think she should have tackled him instead? LOL

She should have done what she did with out the hitting. Grabbed him by the back of the neck and dragged him away. The only time he almost got away was when she let go to smack him. How is that fantasy?

"CashInFist wrote:

So you DO have a breaking point where you WOULD beat your kid when they deserve it. That again was my point...

That's not a good analogy. I would stop a stranger from stabbing someone, that doesn't mean that I am allowed to beat strangers.

"Two Tacos wrote:

That's not a good analogy. I would stop a stranger from stabbing someone, that doesn't mean that I am allowed to beat strangers.

Weak post. I mean, seriously TT?

He said that there is a breaking point where an ass whooping is in order. Maybe some of us have a different threshold, but there is still a time when it is needed.

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