Why?

"Ambrose Bierce wrote:

Why do I always feel like everything is worthless and that the more I try and do something the harder it becomes only to end up falling apart in the end? I know its not always true but I feel like it is. I can't shake this overwhelming feeling of loneliness and bitterness towards everyone. Short of taking a long walk off a short pier I can't get rid of it and the more I try the worse it gets. WTF honestly

If you're still on, PM me....I'll be up late.

I'm still new to the site. Were exactly do I have go to PM that and it says your offline so probably a moot point at this time anyway. Thank you for the thought at least. It is appreciated.

I post from my phone bro....i was merely suggesting PM for perhaps a more candid chat if you're interested

"Ambrose Bierce wrote:

I'm still new to the site. Were exactly do I have go to PM that and it says your offline so probably a moot point at this time anyway. Thank you for the thought at least. It is appreciated.

Click on my user name, or go to my profile and select Private Message. Type whatever you want and I'll get it.

only thing listed is Visitor Messages. No private message option. Thank you for reaching out at least but I'm not having any luck getting this to work. I don't want to keep you up or anything either.

"Ambrose Bierce wrote:

only thing listed is Visitor Messages. No private message option. Thank you for reaching out at least but I'm not having any luck getting this to work. I don't want to keep you up or anything either.

I'm up for a few more hours....it's not a problem. You must have Private messages off.

To answer your original question, you have got to have some perspective. Things aren't ever that bad as they seem. What do you do to relax?

I try to mostly distract my self from thinking by watching movies/tv shows or playing games. anything that causes me to focus on something else otherwise my mind tends to starts dragging me down. I was exercising for a bit but wasn't really relaxing. I've always had issues relaxing both physically and mentally which only compounds things. The perspective thing isn't the problem so much though. Mentally I know they arn't and it's just how some things happen but emotionally I can't shake it off. My thoughts and feelings don't mess. I know that everything will be ok but I can't convincing myself to feel that they will kinda thing. Its confusing I know. Sorry about that but I don't know how else to describe it.

"Ambrose Bierce wrote:

I try to mostly distract my self from thinking by watching movies/tv shows or playing games. anything that causes me to focus on something else otherwise my mind tends to starts dragging me down. I was exercising for a bit but wasn't really relaxing. I've always had issues relaxing both physically and mentally which only compounds things. The perspective thing isn't the problem so much though. Mentally I know they arn't and it's just how some things happen but emotionally I can't shake it off. My thoughts and feelings don't mess. I know that everything will be ok but I can't convincing myself to feel that they will kinda thing. Its confusing I know. Sorry about that but I don't know how else to describe it.

Dude, I'm no medical professional, but it sounds like you have some form of anxiety/panic attack problem.

I am hoping to get some sort of medical help in the near future but the problems I've had are im perfectly fine for a while and then something happens and it feels like everything just falls apart and their is no way of knowing when or how long before things feel normalish. Usually when it happens by the time I see someone its in the past and usually no longer an issue. It's like manic depression but it's not an out of the blue sorta thing. Something always sets it off and it just all goes down hill from their kinda thing. Anxiety I would def agree with mostly because I'm prone to paranoia but not so much panic attack kinda thing. If that makes sense

Go get that help now. Talk to your doc, clergy, shrink, whoever. Some employers offer free, anonymous counseling sessions. See about something like that. The longer this sits the worse it will be. In the meantime, I suggest building some confidence somehow. Set a goal doing ______, once you hit that goal, step up the goal in the same task.

I'd forgotten about the whole goal setting thing. yea I'm in the works of setting something up with the VA. Hopefully it's something. I try to remind myself not to focus on the negative so much but it gets to be so overwhelming sometimes. I just feel like I'm somehow behind everyone else some times. Like missing a class in school and you need to catch up but no one to get notes from kinda thing. It's partially an envy thing but its more out of my inability to have or even keep the sorta things that are good in my life that they seem to have kinda thing. Like a part of me is sabotaging me and my life.

"Ambrose Bierce wrote:

I'd forgotten about the whole goal setting thing. yea I'm in the works of setting something up with the VA. Hopefully it's something. I try to remind myself not to focus on the negative so much but it gets to be so overwhelming sometimes. I just feel like I'm somehow behind everyone else some times. Like missing a class in school and you need to catch up but no one to get notes from kinda thing. It's partially an envy thing but its more out of my inability to have or even keep the sorta things that are good in my life that they seem to have kinda thing. Like a part of me is sabotaging me and my life.

Wait you're a vet? How many tours bro?

only one. nothing flashy. None of that American Hero bs. Just a POG with time to kill.

"Ambrose Bierce wrote:

only one. nothing flashy. None of that American Hero bs. Just a POG with time to kill.

Wasn't going for that.....pogs serve a purpose.....branch?

I do agree that it is a good idea to see a specialist.

I have read that exercise helps this feeling. I have already read that diet and sleep also can help. You might be allergic to gluten and I have heard wonders of people who have eliminated sugar.

Some other tips that could alleviate some of the pain while researching seeing a specialist. Write a gratitude journal, take time out of your day to dedicate to remembering happy memories, and stand up straight with your shoulders out while smiling(this might sound silly but it releases dopamine into your system).

Army National Guard. No didn't think you were but knew/know so many people that tried to make themselves out to be freakin Rambo or something. I hated that SOOO much.

"Ambrose Bierce wrote:

Army National Guard. No didn't think you were but knew/know so many people that tried to make themselves out to be freakin Rambo or something. I hated that SOOO much.

You still in? If so, go hook up with the chaplain

nah got out back in 2007. Had enough of the internal politics which amounted to everyone stabbing each other in the back trying to get ahead. The ranking system in the National Guard is rather

I have changed my diet quite a bit over the years. Cut out soda and caffeine as much as I could. Avoiding fast food when possible. Cutting back on meat and trying to eat more vegetables and fruit. Sleep has always been an issue for me but I've been listening to this guided meditation for sleeping I found on youtube that was working. Usually play Old Time Radio programs when I sleep to drown out outside noise. Yea I gotta work on that posture thing. another in a long list of things I should work on.

"Ambrose Bierce wrote:

nah got out back in 2007. Had enough of the internal politics which amounted to everyone stabbing each other in the back trying to get ahead. The ranking system in the National Guard is rather

I have changed my diet quite a bit over the years. Cut out soda and caffeine as much as I could. Avoiding fast food when possible. Cutting back on meat and trying to eat more vegetables and fruit. Sleep has always been an issue for me but I've been listening to this guided meditation for sleeping I found on youtube that was working. Usually play Old Time Radio programs when I sleep to drown out outside noise. Yea I gotta work on that posture thing. another in a long list of things I should work on.

Just remember the glass is half full. Where do you live? Depending on where you live, I may know a guy you can talk to.

The chaplains weren't much help mostly because I didn't really follow one specific religion. That and the time a chaplain's assistant gave me a black eye didn't help. Also why clergy or religious personal arn't an option mostly because they tend to be put off by the fact I don't follow their specific faith. I don't blame them or hold it against them because its a very personal thing for them and I respect that but it doesn't help me any either.

No, the guy I know is a counselor who is an ex squid

Newark, NJ right now. I'm typically iffy about the whole military thing but money being tight as it is the VA is pretty much my only choice right now. Thank you though. This has helped more than I was expecting. Thank you again. Tomorrow I'm going to try and get some things around and try and get my self back on track. I'll remember to set some goals so I have something specific to shoot for. Going to try and get some sleep and hopefully this whole thing passes by morning so I can attempt to get on with my life. Again thank you for everything.

"Ambrose Bierce wrote:

Newark, NJ right now. I'm typically iffy about the whole military thing but money being tight as it is the VA is pretty much my only choice right now. Thank you though. This has helped more than I was expecting. Thank you again. Tomorrow I'm going to try and get some things around and try and get my self back on track. I'll remember to set some goals so I have something specific to shoot for. Going to try and get some sleep and hopefully this whole thing passes by morning so I can attempt to get on with my life. Again thank you for everything.

You're welcome. The guy is in Virginia, so he isn't terribly far away if you change your mind. Good night and keep your head up man!