This is something I have kept to my self for sometime, but recently I have been encouraged to talk to others about it. By doing so it may help me to deal with the issues at hand. So here we go, I have been battling depression for a while now. I have only recently sought treatment and began med regiments. The meds have helped but I still feel off, very down most of the time. I am angry far too much and can have explosive outburst at times. I guess that is better then before I started the meds, at that time I just didn’t care about anything. I was almost emotionless but learned to put up a front so others wouldn’t notice. Now I have emotion, but find it hard to control at times.
It is very difficult to come on here and talk about this, even more so because I don’t plan using the anonymous option. I feel that if I am going to do this, and have it help me I need to be forthright from the get go. I do have many issue going on in my life right now (I do not want to go into detail on these because it would affect others and it is not my right to drag them into this) that have increased the stress levels I am enduring. This is a fight I must win for my family and for myself.
I was asked where I find solace, well with my family especially with my granddaughter, and here (because you guys are family to). So, here I am my heart on my sleeve, for all to see. I can only continue to move forward one step at a time. I know I am not a big poster on this board, but I have come to respect many here for their actions through their post which have been immense. They are a credit to our family here and I am sure to those whose life’s they have touched. I was once told that you never know how you my effect someone’s life, no matter how brief you may interact with them. So, I felt along with this I should acknowledge a few here that for one reason or another have had the effect on my whether they know it or not, but by any means this is not all, it would talk me to long to list. So I want to say thank you to:
Fin Fan in Cali
CNC66
Ice Dragon
Alen1
Lucky
1Armychick
My 2 cents
And
Padre31
If you made it this far, thanks for reading.
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Crappy Tipper, Celtkin, NaboCane and 17 others like this.
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You got nothing but my respect and prayers brother. Whatever you are going through I pray that it strengthens you and that you are able to overcome it.
The Rev, cnc66 and USArmyFinFan like this. -
you know me bro. im down for whatever. you need to talk or whatever i gotcha bro. glad to see i have had a positive impact though. take that haters :P
The Rev, HolliFinFan and USArmyFinFan like this. -
You are in my prayers brother. If you ever feel up to a chat, lemmi know, I'm game.
USArmyFinFan likes this. -
No need to be thankful bro, I'm just happy to help. If there's anything I can help you with in the future, let me know. :up:
- AlenUSArmyFinFan likes this. -
Bless you.
I am here as well.
I, like you, have been very depressed and felt like I'd never feel good again. But, with the meds and a good Dr. it will get better for you.
The people on here are the best of the best and helped me through a lot of bad times.
So, I too, want to thank them.
I'm here if you need to talk.
Just hold fast!USArmyFinFan likes this. -
Who's "And"?
;)
Seriously, buddy, hang in there. Beating depression is a long road, but with the help of a good support system, it's a fight you can win.2k5 and dolphindebby like this. -
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Good luck bro.. I've lived on the other side of depression and can partially understand what you are going through..
Stay strong, be true to yourself, and if their is a chemical component to this illness get the proper treatment and medication....
Even though it is probably painful, confronting the past and being honest about your feelings without shame can really get you moving in the right direction. The fact that you were able to make this post is already a great sign.
Good luck in your journey. We are pulling for you.USArmyFinFan and dolphindebby like this. -
I know all too well what depression is like.
Hang in there the PM box is open.dolphindebby likes this. -
I have a lot of stuff going on in my life bro. but send me a pm if you need someone. Thanks for the kind words.:wink2:
The Rev, USArmyFinFan and SICK like this. -
USArmyFinFan, I know all about depression and how it can take over your life. I don't believe in medication personally but what doesn't work for me may work for someone else like yourself. Whatever it takes to get past it. Hope you don't mind me asking but, can you share what the source(s) of your depression is? What is the root of your pain? Just know that you are not alone and that there are many other people struggling at this very moment. You seem like you have a good head on your shoulders. I don't want to sound like I'm preaching but sometimes you just have to not take life so seriously.
steveincolorado likes this. -
Simply, it happen after returning from 15 Months in Iraq, I saw some messed up*&^% over there.
Part of my problem is I didn't take anything seriously, I just didn't care, I mean no emotion what so ever. Meds brought me out of that but now I have a flood of emotion.Fin Fan In Cali, opfinistic and The Dolfan like this. -
Are you sure it's depression and not PTSD?
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I've never been in a warzone and can only imagine what it was like over there. You were trained to not feel emotion and be a killing machine. I'm sure there are many others who have experienced or are experiencing exactly what you mentioned. Can you describe some of the emotions you are dealing with? I'm guessing anger is one of the main ones. It might help for you to describe the emotions that you're feeling.
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I'm here Bro.
Eh, one thing pushes out another is the old saying, the thing of it is, is knowing when to come up for air and just be. -
I would love to say something good here, but to be honest with you, I haven't a clue what to say. I know from a friend that saying things doens't always help, but listening does wonders.
We on here are more than just Dolphins fans, we are one damn fine family:up: -
Ohiophinphan Chaplain Staff Member Luxury Box
Please first know that you are in my prayers.
I am hoping given your location and the fact you are getting help that the help is coming through military or veteran circles that are familar with the after effects of combat situations. If not I urge you to at least see your chaplain. Chaplain Lembke (not sure I have that spelled right) is a very good man.
Depression is an illness just like you would have contracted some kind of fever. It needs to be treated as such. In addition to the medical side there are the repressed emotions that you are now coming to grips with. Seeing what you saw caused an emotional response even if it never showed. It is sitting somewhere inside of you and will eventually come out. Getting it out in a safe, controlled fashion is what you need and your chaplain/counselor/whomever should be able to aid you in the process.
Don't try and hold them in, that is what got you here in the first place. You had to hold them to some degree just to survive but your brain can't hold them forever and now knows it is OK to let them go. Help find a safe spot.
Physical activity such as running and extreme workouts are often helpful so you might ask your helper what suggestions they might have in this regard.
You are safe here. We genuinely care.
Blessing and best wishes to you! I remain around.Fin Fan In Cali and The Rev like this. -
The Rev Totus Tuus Staff Member Administrator Luxury Box Club Member