If you walk into a men's room at a truck stop and decide to stick your dick through a glory hole to see what would happen, you are clearly qualified to make the same sort of inept decisions that have plagued my team for decades. Let's take a look at a few.
1. Forcing your Hall of Fame coach into retirement for Jimmy Johnson, only to have him quit and hand the team over to porn-stache Dave Wannstedt.
2. Passing on Drew Brees TWICE! Oh yeah, Culpepper is the much safer choice. You ****ing idiots, he was rehabbing at a 24hr Fitness for Christ sakes.
3. Using 2nd round picks on ****ty QBs instead of a first rounder: AJ Feeley, Daunte Culpepper, John Beck, Chad Henne
4. Learning about Ricky Williams' hippy drum circle bull**** every game he played AFTER he quit only to return b/c he realized he need cash to travel to 3rd world ****holes.
5. Passing on Mike Tomlin for a guy whose parents named him Cam Cameron. This douche was fired from the football powerhouse Indiana for ****ting down his leg.
6. Outside of Shula, our past coaches are horrible. Wannstedt, Bates, Saban, Cameron, Sparano. Little Nicky Saban realized that in the NFL, you have to wait your turn and draft players instead of recruiting them, so he took his ball and went home.
7. Finally, one more note on Saban. Employees were not allowed to look or speak to the coach unless spoken to, and he yelled at a admin assistant for buying the wrong Little Debbie snack cakes. No one can make **** like that up.
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