Damn, dude. :pity:


If you need to talk to someone, I'll be happy to listen.

 

Sorry to hear of your troubles, buddy. But if it makes you strive to be better than you'll be alright.

As for the girl, I've come to believe that making the right choice there is one of the most important life decisions you'll ever make. And frankly at 19 you don't have enough experience to make that decision. So add this heartbreak to your experience and it will help you down the line.

I'd like to say that you won't get played again, but odds are you will. The key is letting it make you smarter while not letting it make you bitter. You're a guy who doesn't hate, so keep being that guy. Just a smarter, more experienced version of him.

 

Good luck to you-you sound like you have the perfect plan.


some chicks are evil, man.

 

Do yourself a favor and print that rant and stick it somewhere where you see it everyday. That way you are reminded of your goal. Otherwise, the hate eventually evaporates and it becomes all too easy to get lax on what your goals are.

Sorry to hear that about the girl. The lesson to be learned here is that...they are call crazy. Every single last ****ing one of them. Even the ones that swear they aren't (as a counterpoint, every guy is a creep on some level, we just are). The key is to find one that you can tolerate.

But bad breakups are a good thing usually. Yes, they suck, but you learn and grow from them. Sounds like you got yours out of the way early...kudos.

Now go drink your balls off, swear off that chick for eternity and start working on your goals...january 2nd.

 

Alex, you got a raw deal.

But your young and the right woman will come. Keep your head up and keep being the good person that you are!

Happy New year to you and may it be great!

 

Sometimes you need to see how bad it can be before you realize how good YOU can be.

 

sorry to hear this man. let her change you not in your hopes for finding love, but in who you give that love and admiration too. Don't let your anger kill your desire to find love, and your ability to give it out to people.
Glad to see you are taking this well and are going to turn it into a positive. Have fun being single, and if you need someone to talk to , holla at your boy! Happy new year man.

 

So she conned you? What a *****.

 

So youre a naive 19 year old....welcome to the real world dude. Some people are self serving idiots and some people are unselfish. 15 years from now when she (God forbid) has a husband that smacks her she will realize what an idiot she was for crapping all over a good guy like yourself. Looks fade, personality may change through the years, character reveals who youre dealing with as cliche as it sounds. Get to know someone's core values before making such snap decisions based on looks and "the click". Dont change who you are just because some chick played you.

Best of luck bro and keep your head up. :wink2:

 

Bro, I'm sorry. No one deserves that.

On the other hand, it happens to nearly all of us. That's just how it is.

You're on the right path; let this teach you something. It's the right thing to do now. The resolve you carry forward from this will serve you all of your many years.

One thing to always remember, though, as a strict rule of thumb: people with substance abuse issues are ALWAYS a bad risk; unfortunately, people with mental issues who don't address them are number 1A on that list.

Last thing: be strong. She's going to come back to you - takers always do. Don't let her back in, whatever you do.

 

Alex, I have "known" you for a long time and there has not been a moment that I was not impressed by you. Bro, at one time, you were posting 28,000 post a week. :) THAT is impressive.

On a serious note: You can not control the level of "***-ness" that is exuded by the people you give your heart to but you can win by moving on and growing to be a better person with each day. She wins if you "die" because she left you but you win if you become a person that she later regrets leaving.

My young brother, YOU are that sort of person.

 

Brother I feel for you. The pain that you are feeling now will make you a better and stronger person for it. :yes: I felt the same way when I came back from Saudia Arabia from Desert Storm, and my first wife, my high school sweetheart said I want out one night when we went to bed. I know your chin is where mine and many others have been. This is indeed a blessing that it happened now, and not when you were married. Yes it is a big downer now, but it is time to move on, and know in your heart that you will be better for it. Just because you were taken advantage of here doesn't mean there isn't a great woman out there for you. Keep the faith! Must keep your chin up, and as each day passes you will be better. If you need to talk shoot me a pm and I will give you my cell, and home number brother.:wink2: May 2010 be an awesome year for you bro.:hi5:

 

I too would remind myself of those words everyday, this is your motivation to do whatever you want to do or need to do, to be happy in life. Stay focused on the goals you have, thirty-years old comes VERY quick.....the time is now.

 

Sucks dude. Sorry to hear.

I'm reminded of the line from Cheers where Norm says "women...you can't live with the. Pass the beer nuts." Kinda says it all. Know what I mean?

In all seriousness, try not to let this harden your heart. It's cool if you want to use it as motivation to be a better person, but try not to let it change you are deep down inside. Fact is, if you keep your heart open, you'll be rewarded much more than you will be hurt in life. I know you don't know me from Adam, but trust me on this.

Hope 2010 is much better to you.

Now, go out and find yourself a hot new babe, and bring in the new year right! I mean it. Like...now. Tonight. Go!

 

drank a few so be forewarned.

i'm only 24 years of age yet a year and a few months ago i thought i had my life wrapped up in a nice little bundle. come to find out that "out of the blue" i'm no longer worthy of "being in a relationship" with. this is not what she said, but how I took it.

most of the people here know my story. her and I are friends. it was just not meant to be as a relationship.

don't let someone who you think may be your final love drag you down. i consider myself fairly young. I've had my share of disappointments, heartache, and troubles.. some of which i consider unusual and that the normal "joe" wouldn't have, but that doesn't stop me from believing that I am good enough, strong enough, or compassionate enough to handle my own day to day business AND catch that amazing person left out in the sea. and yes i do believe they are out there. i am 0 for "x" in relationships lasting, yet I still believe.

a lot of times i consider myself negative. i'm usually lost within a sea of chaos, which is why i tend to gravitate towards peaceful spirituality and am of the path of "least resistance" as much as I can muster. yes i have a lot of underlying anger and resentment for what has happened to me and what i have been through with some people, but should that tarnish what I can be?

absolutely not.

there is fight in you, but only if you want it. you have to want your life to be better, to be different. it is not a matter of what you CAN do but what you're willing TO do.

figure out what you want your life to be. it's not easy all the time, and it's not fun. but it IS highly rewarding and worth the effort once you figure it out.

i have but a few stones on this path and i am all but grateful that i can call those stones home. a bedrock to land on when i feel uneasy. they are not many, but they are what i know.

best of luck.

edit:

happy new years bro, and may this decade be better than the last.

 

Awesome post for a few reasons.....

1. You are obviously driven.....I know this feeling as well and am happy to see it lit up inside another human being. Good luck to you brother..i hope you rock the world.

2. At first I cringed at your intensity....and thought that it could be for the wrong reasons...but you addressed that at the end. You want to make something great out of yourself and most of all to make the world a better place...we should all strive to do that, and I hope that you accomplish it. As long as that is where your drive is coming from I know you'll be fine.

Love sucks some times, you're now aware of that. I'm sorry that it's a lesson that you had to learn...but you'll be the better for it. Look to yourself for happiness....the girl will come along with it.

 

Very sorry to hear, bro. Just keep up your current attitude and you'll be on the right track. You've always struck me as a pretty determined guy so I think you'll be fine. Happy New Year, dude.

 

Good luck man. Ive been there. Your friends and family will get you through it.
just learn from it.

 

Sorry I hate to be blunt but your ****IN 19yrs old. Stop being a ***** and i hope you become more of man after this. Im sorry if I sound mean but damn all these young adult sound like wusses in today age. Stop being in relationship and stop being in love your only 19 you dont even know what you really want. Hence why that young whore cheated on you. Why because we are all whore during that age. Wait till your upper 20's before thinking of getting serious. You'll understand when you're older I hope.

 

the brutal truth :lol:

 

I wanted to add another reason why this will be a positive. You got to learn how this girl reacts when something goes bad. Obviously, she felt you had lied about something. I assume that this is related to her mental issues and not something you did, but that's really irrelevant. Even if it were reasonable for her to be angry with you, you learned that she reacts by trying to hurt you. Imagine if you had gotten married and had kids. How many more ways would have to hurt you then? IMO what happened yesterday may have been the luckiest day of your life thus far. :up:

 

whata joke. i was married with a child a 20.....and iam 23 next month, and still completley in love and have a wonderful family. get off your high horse. just because you've lived longer than us "young whores" doesnt mean you have completley learned from your mistakes if so.......everyone above 30 would be perfect and divorce rates wouldnt be sky high like it is.......you cant "learn" anything without doing it. not like you wake up at 40 and go "oh now i get it cause iam 40"

ridiculous

 

All I'm going to say is that I went through a similar experience around the same time in my life. I've been burned several times since then. Remember each burn, and learn from it. Bad relationships in alot of ways are more important than finding good ones. They help define you, and help you find out exactly what you want in a woman and a relationship. They also help you learn what is ok and what isn't. There are things now that would cause me to walk away without a second thought if it were to happen, where I would have put up with it when I was younger.

Live and learn, and good luck!

 

So either you were...

1. A social outcast who couldn't get close to a girl until his late 20's

or

2. An ******* who used and abused people

Outside of that I don't get your post. We're not all "whores" running around sewing our wild oats. Some of us are hard working focused people with better things to do than jerks others around. I've dated quite a few girls, but not one of them was I just using for the time being. Either I found out it wasn't going to work and ended it right away, or we made a long relationship out of it. While none of them have turned into "the one" thus far that doesn't mean that I didn't learn a **** ton from most of them. Romantic relationships are just like any other in that they help people grow as a person. There's struggles and pain associated all kinds of relationships and to downplay a personal betrayal is pretty out of touch.

I'm going to go on the record and say that I'm 26 and in retrospect I will agree that many young people often get too serious too fast and would be better served to waiting for serious relationships until later. But I'm not saying that deep relationships for young people don't work out, or don't have merit as well.

It's a big world and there's many paths to walk through life.

 

Bro the brother needs support right now.:wink2: You could of worded this a lot better and still gotten your point across.:yes:

 

COME TO THE DARK SIDE LUKE....

but seriously, that sucks dude but it happens to everyone at some point. She'll probabl try to get back together with you down the road when she realizes her mistake. Dont take her back. She sounds like she floats with the breeze too much for a serious relationship and if she's willing to throw away what you offered her then she's a fool

 

I'm a whore. Huge one. Now if only I could find women willing to help me be a whore, all would be right with the universe.

 

this presupposes that the universe wants you to procreate which might be wishful thinking on your part. just saying

 

worst mistake ever. Live and learn bud, live and learn.

 

First of all, let me echo my Finbrothers and suggest that you ignore negative comments. You don't need that right now. This was a heartbreaking experience and it probably won't be your last, but that's no reason to despair. That's what life is about sometimes. We get challenges and it's our lot in life to overcome them. From what I read in your OP it sounds like you will.

I don't know if you're religious, but from that perspective this experience has purpose, you just can't see it right now. As my own example, and this wasn't a romance, but the point still fits, there are people from my past who made my life miserable. Looking back I see that if the hadn't been in my life, I probably would still be in Miami, just a minor cog in the wheel of Miami-Dade County and not accomplishing too much. I wouldn't be living in Jeusalem today on the verge of doing exactly what I want to do.

This quote says it all for me, especially the part in bold.

:up:

That's the right attitude! I know that this is something that you're not going to take to heart right away because I've been there too. Coming out of college I felt that it was my mission in life to save the world. My experience at the County made me realize that there are obstacles for that also. Don't get discouraged when you get that.

 

good point. after all that is why God turned you gay. :lol:

 

Nah, God turned me 40, overweight and going bald. Gay might have been a better choice :lol: